


Completing Encounters

by dot11



Category: Gilmore Girls
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-22
Updated: 2015-10-22
Packaged: 2018-04-27 14:59:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 24,767
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5053267
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dot11/pseuds/dot11
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"When Jess asks Rory to come with him at the end of season 4, they get a chance to finish their conversation... sort of. As a result, their stories take little twists along the way..."</p><p> </p><p>  <em>As a "Throwback Thursday" challenge to myself, and in honour of Gilmore Girls being renewed (!) so many years later... I'm re-publishing my old Gilmore Girls Fanfiction from 2010! Stay tuned for the next 9 Thursdays for the A03 debut of my first FanFiction! </em></p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Come With Me

Jess burst through the door and stopped. Dean was there.

"What are _you_ doing here?" She asks. _Ouch. Well, she has a right to be upset_ , he thinks. She'll warm up eventually, once he explains.

He pushes forward, knowing he has to say what he has to say. What the book said is still pressed in his mind. He has to do this now. He's ready. He's read the book, he knows what he has to do, so why not just do it? He pretends Dean isn't there.

"I need to talk to you."

"Jess-" the hulk of a man starts.

"I need," he glares at Dean, "to talk to you," he finishes, looking at Rory.

"What's going on?" Jess rolls his eyes. _Go away dean, this isn't your business._

"What are you _doing_ here?" Rory asks again. He tries to pretend her tone of voice is warmer.

"Rory, please." She was much calmer when he pictured this on the way over.

"Rory?" Dean looks at Rory cautiously. She freezes for a moment, not knowing what the best thing to do here is. But of course, the two of them starting a fight right there in the hallway won't help anything.

She looks at Dean a little defeated. "Go. Go home."

"No." Dean says with a sneer to Jess.

"Yes! Go. You should go." She looks at him with pleading eyes.

Jess holds his breath, wishing the whole situation would go in his favour. Dean finally leaves. Rory watches him go, and Jess throws him a menacing glance over his shoulder, then turns back to Rory.

"Why won't you leave me alone? You won't go away!"

"Rory..."

"What do you want?"

"I don't know, I just... wanted to... see you, talk to you. Just-"

"What?" She looks uneasy.

He takes a breath. He knows it sounds silly, but he's come this far. "Come with me."

She looks away, not sure she heard him properly. "What?"

"Come with me." He says more urgently.

"Where?" She's starting to think this sounds silly. He hasn't thought this through.

"I don't know! Away!" He's on the defensive. Of course it sounds crazy. That's not the point here!

"Are you crazy?" She asks, partly trying to push him away, partly concerned.

"Probably! Do it, come with me. Don't think about it." He speaks fast, trying to get her to understand what's made so much sense to him the whole way over here.

"I can't do that!" She turns and walks into her room.

"You don't think you can do it, but you can. You can do whatever you want!"

"It's _not_ what I want!" She pleads.

"It _is,_ I _know_ you."

"You don't know me!"

He tries to grab her as she turns away, speaking over her so she won't start on a rant.

"Look, we'll go to New York. We'll work, we'll live together, we'll be together. It's what I want, it's what you want too!"

"No!"

"I wanna be with you, but not here. Not this place. Not in Stars Hollow. We have to start _new_."

"There's _nothing_ to start!"

"But you're packed! Your stuff is all in boxes! It's perfect, you're ready. And I'm ready. I'm ready for this. You can count on me now. I know you couldn't count on me before, but you _can_ now, you _can_. "

"No!" She moves away again. He's saying the things she's always wanted him to say. Why now? Why so late? Everything he's saying hurts because it's too late. He follows her.

"You know we're supposed to be together. I knew it the first time I saw you two _years_ ago. And you know it too. I know you do."

"No! No, no no, no," she feels cornered and can't breathe.

"Don't say no just to make me stop talking, or make me go away. Only say no if you really don't want to be with me."

Rory looks at him defiantly, but can't say anything. She needs time to think, to process, and he won't let her. He just burst through with his crazy ideas and constant talking. What's happening? She opens her mouth. _No_ is on the tip of her tongue, but she knows it's only there to shut him up, just like he said.

"I-" She starts, but she can't think of what to say. He waits, staring at her intently. She breaks her eyes away from his before... before what? The gaze was just too much.

"Jess, stop. You're not thinking straight. What are you even asking me to do? Run away with you? You know I couldn't do that. I've got school, I've got my mom. My home. This is all crazy, you know that."

"Well then, just for a little. Come with me now, we'll figure out the rest later."

"No, Jess. I can't trust you. You say I can, but I can't. You always show up being all – _you_ , and then I turn around again, and you're gone. That's not _fair_ to me."

"I know it's not fair. I've changed now. Will you listen to me?"

"How? How have you changed? The last I saw of you was your back, again, after you show up out of the blue to tell me-" she suddenly looks down, realizing what she almost said. She ducks away to the door, holding it open for him, to cover her mistake.

"After what, Rory?"

"You know what. Jess," she's about to tell him to leave, but he won't let her.

"I told you I love you."

She can't meet his eyes.

"Rory, I told you I _love_ you. And you just stood there."

"Well what did you expect me to say?"

"The obvious would have been nice, but I guess that was expecting a bit much," he smirks.

"I hadn't seen you in almost a year. You come back saying things like that, without warning. And before I can gather my thoughts, you're gone again! Jess, you always run."

He stops. Instead of retorting, he looks at her. He knows there's truth to what she's saying. What did the book say? He looks down, a little overcome. His mind is racing, and he can barely keep track.

"What would you have said?" he mumbles.

"To what?" She's still irritated, still ready to fight. She hasn't noticed his change to calm yet.

"If I'd waited, what would you have said?"

She stops, unsure. "I-I don't know. Does it even matter right now?"

He raises his head and looks her in the eyes. Yes. It does matter.

"Jess..." Her eyes are confused and sad. He can't put a name on what he sees there, but it definitely scares him. He turns away, breaking their gaze abruptly.

"It was a mistake to come here like this. I'm sorry, Rory." He turns and begins to walk towards the door. Rory, realizing the spell is about to break, panics.

"Wait, Jess!" She grabs his coat sleeve and holds onto his arm, not sure what to say, but terrified he's about to leave with things unsettled again. He pauses, turning defiantly to the arm she's holding prisoner, ready to make a smart remark.

She pulls herself toward him, and without thinking or speaking, presses her lips to his.

At first he's shocked. He was ready to storm out, and suddenly... He lets the warmth of her spread through him. He holds her arms, bringing her closer. And then he finally lets go, digging his hands into her hair. He pushes against her, trying to get closer, and she brings their bodies around, pushing her back against the door to close it. They pull apart with their foreheads together, his hands holding her face gently, breathless. He's afraid to open his eyes to find this is all just a dream.

Jess silently laughs at himself, and then opens his eyes. Rory's are inches away, big blue crystals. She lets out a small laugh too. His breath catches as his mouth turns into a lopsided grin. He slowly begins to drop his hands. "I forgot how easy that part was." She smiles shyly in reply. He swallows loudly, almost afraid to ask. "So does this mean-?"

Rory lifts her head quickly and puts a finger to his lips to stop him. "Shush," she scolds. "You'll ruin it."

Jess' eyes light up at her challenge and he kisses her with abandon. Pulling her closely, their hands moving restlessly around each other, making up for lost time, reacquainting themselves with familiar territory. It just felt right. All thoughts but those of each other in the moment consumed them.

Jess, feeling the weight of his bag on his shoulder, smoothly slinks it to the floor, trying not to disturb the moment. Without thinking, Rory pushes his jacket off as well, enjoying the closer heat that the removed layer brings. He lifts his hands back to her, ducking beneath her shirt to feel the smooth warmth of her stomach and back. She pushes him backwards, through the room. As they stumble, he brings his hands up, bringing her shirt over her head. She tosses it to the ground without a second thought and keeps pushing him, removing his shirt in the process.

His back hits a wall, which he realizes is the door frame of a bedroom. He catches a glimpse of a bed further inside, but continues kissing her. He realizes his hands are at the edge of her belt, and he pauses, afraid to let himself go further. They both stand there for a moment in the doorway, clutching each other, feeling the other's heart beating against their chests like angry drums. He turns his head and carefully kisses her jaw. She breaths and nudges him forward with her body. She whispers in his ear, "Jess, please."

It's all he needs. It's all they both need. They slowly sink down onto the bed, feeling right together, happy if even for the moment. Everything else can wait until later.

* * *

Neither could stop smiling as they fought off sleep, tangled with each other. Suddenly they were remembering old times again, laughing at Luke, Lorelai and the characters of Stars Hollow.

"I can't believe she did that!"

"You can't say your mother ever really warmed to me," Jess laughed bitterly.

"Hey, she had her moments. I was bringing her around!"

"That would have taken an army. I was the bad boy tainting the saintly Rory Gilmore, remember? The whole town wasn't really sad to see me go, and you can't deny that." He grinned to himself. Rory's smile slipped a little.

"Not everyone." She had to say it. She didn't want to ruin the moment, but she just had to say it. Jess stopped, realizing his mistake.

"Rory..." he began, but she kissed him quickly on the lips.

"I mean Luke had a really hard time replacing you. Kirk nearly made a run for the position before he came to his senses." She smiled carefully, turning away on her side. Jess looked down at her.

"Did he now? That must have been terrible." He slid down as she nodded, fitting his body to her back, slipping an arm around her and hugging her to him closely.

"Like I said, Luke came to his senses."

She turned back towards him. Their eyes locked, dark and full of things unsaid. He softly brushed the hair away from her face. She nestled closer to him. "You won't run away again, will you?" She knew she sounded too vulnerable, despite her attempt to hide it. He smiled a soft, lopsided smile, and pulled her close. He kissed her deeply, hoping that would answer her question better than anything he could say. They both drifted off to sleep, content in each others arms.

* * *

A car engine woke Rory with a start. Cautiously opening her eyes to the harsh sun, she began to remember the previous night. So much had happened. Too much that it must have been a dream. Slowly stretching, she realized it had definitely happened. He was definitely back, and sleeping beside her safely, her Jess. She smiled widely and turned to kiss him good morning.

The bed was empty beside her.

 _No,_ she thought, though alarm bells started blaring in her head. _No, no, no._ She sat up, looking around. Nothing. Everything was silent. _This can't be right!_ Terrified, she called out his name, just in case she was missing something. In case he was playing a terrible joke. Nothing. She pulled a shirt over her head and looked around the room frantically. His clothes were gone. _He must have left a note!_ She fought panic as she realized that the only things in the room were herself, her few remaining boxes, and what little pride she'd had left from the night before.

Reality seeped through her skin like poison. She had fallen for it again. He was gone. They'd had a wonderful night, and he was gone. Again. How could she let herself go through this? She knew what he was like, she _knew_ he wasn't worth the pain that followed. She felt her breath start to come out like gasping sobs and she bent over, trying to breathe.

She stopped herself. Not again. _Not_ this time. All she had left to do was get home. She would leave and forget this ever happened, and life would go on as normal. She was stronger now.

Silently, she held her breath and dressed. She quickly packed her boxes into her car and left her dorm room behind. It was easy to leave a place she knew she would never see again.

* * *

Jess knocked on the door, but found it had been left unlocked. He grinned to himself, trying to balance his things.

"Yale doesn't mess around when they shut down campus." He turned the knob with his finger and pushed against the door with his back. "Do you know how long it took me to find a decent coffee place in town?" He nearly tipped one of the cups before regaining its balance in his hands. He was a few steps into the room when he gathered his surroundings. Jess froze.

All the boxes that filled the room the night before were gone. He didn't need to go any further to know that the bedroom was empty too. He stood alone in a bare white room, clutching his coffee cups. Like a fool.

His face fell to a dark scowl and he nodded to himself. It's not like he deserved any less. He turned and left the room, leaving the door open as he threw the coffee cups into the garbage and he stormed off as fast as his legs could carry him.

Jess got in his car, and he drove.


	2. It's Nothing

The door to the diner tinkled open merrily. Luke looked up hopefully, but it wasn't her. The boy storming past his customers was anything but happy.

"What are you doing back here?" Luke asked gruffly, surprised. "Hey, you can't just barge in there!" He ran after his nephew who was headed up the stairs to the apartment. "Jess. Aren't you supposed to be in New York by now?"

"Not going there anymore. Here. You can take your stupid book back," he growled as he threw the book on the kitchen table with a loud bang.

"What-? Why aren't you going back? Where are you going?"

"None of your business."

"I'm making it my business." Luke squared off in front of the younger man, waiting for an explanation. "What is it, Jess? Got tired of living the high life? Going to settle down with a picket fence overlooking the nice street-corner sewer rats?"

Jess rolled his eyes. "I'm leaving." He pushed past his Uncle, but the older man blocked his way. Jess looked up, pursing his lips with a glare.

"Did something happen?"

"Nothing happened."

"Did you see Rory? Is that what this is about?"

"I'm leaving."

"So it is. Did you hurt her? Tell me you didn't run off again without saying anything."

Jess looked down, eyes very dark, before looking up with a mocking grimace.

"No, and no. This time it definitely wasn't me. Thanks for the support though." He points over his shoulder to the table. "You should throw that book away. Makes you think you've got _all_ the answers. Load of shit. What the hell are you doing buying books like that anyway? They're for old ladies that live with cats. Jeez, Luke, you've really gone downhill." Jess finally pushed past his stunned Uncle and headed for the stairs.

Luke followed close behind, "Jess!" he shouted.

"I'll send you a post-card," he threw over his shoulder as he rushed through the maze of customers in the diner. He stopped at the door as someone came through. It was Lorelai. She was alone.

She smiled brightly at him, "Hey there sailor! Headed back off to the Big Apple?" Jess adjusted his duffle bag on his shoulder and walked out without a word. "Okay, well, great talking to you again." She awkwardly waved, then headed over to the counter where Luke looked torn. "Well _some_ one looks like he just got his sugar crisp taken away. Wasn't he leaving last night?"

"Yeah, well, he was just returning something," Luke said, staring off at the door absently.

"Right." Lorelai waved her hand in front of his face. "Hello in there? Can I order something, or do you want me to call Cranky Joe back in here so you two can go at it one more time?"

"Sorry. What'll it be?" Luke mentally shook himself.

"Oh- really? Well that was easy. I wanted a show. You know: you make a smart comment, he says something snarky back, you tell him he's a punk, he runs off. It's cute. You could go on tour with it. I bet a lot of people would pay good money."

"Lorelai," he glared at her.

"You could call it 'Grumpy and the Lone Ranger!' You could wear suits, or, y'know, just plaid, since you've already got that scheme working for you quite nicely."

"Lorelai!" He growled, his patience gone.

"Two coffees and pancakes, please," she dropped her hands in her lap like a scolded child.

He gave her a measured gaze. "There's a table free back there, when Rory gets here," he nodded in the direction of the table.

"Oh, saving seats now are we? You're like my own knight in shining armor! You know, the proprietor of this establishment usually frowns at things like this. If you act cool he might not notice and we can run out with candy and not pay for coffee!"

"Just get over there before someone else takes it."

"Thank you, Sir Lucas!" She grinned and started to turn.

"Wait, uh," Luke took a breath and held it for a moment when she looked at him expectantly. "I like your, uh," he motioned around his head awkwardly. Lorelai stopped, not sure what he was doing.

"I'm sorry?" She touched her head to feel if there was anything wrong.

"Your – well, you know. It's nice. It looks nice today."

"Oh! My _hair_?"

Luke gave her a small, satisfied grin and went to help another customer. Lorelai turned toward her table slowly, not sure what to make of that last exchange. She can't help but smile a little to herself. _There is definitely something fishy with him lately._

The door jingled open again, and Lorelai waved down her daughter. "Hey kid, over here. I got this seat saved specially for us."

"You lie, Luke never does that," Rory sat.

"I know. But he did today. I tell you, I think we're in the twilight zone... So you got my note?"

"Yeah I did. Sorry I didn't call earlier. I didn't know how late I'd be, what with all the last minute packing and everything."

"No sweat. Late night?"

Rory looked down and nodded. "Something like that."

"Your grandmother told me about running into you and that boy with the diapers. I've got to say, I was thoroughly _aghast_ she would still pull stuff like that. Who plays match-maker with diapers? There's just a lack of taste there that I thought even Emily Gilmore would never stoop to." Noticing the look on her daughter's face, she added, "so was it that awful?"

"It... was definitely not what I was expecting." Rory looked down again.

Just then, Luke came by with their coffee cups.

"Welcome back, Rory."

"Hey Luke!"

"All moved back in for the summer?"

"Yeah, getting there. But you tend to forget how much stuff you have before it's all in boxes again. It will probably be a while 'till I'm settled."

"You look really tired, can I get you something?"

Lorelai leaned in, "I got us some pancakes!"

"A sundae. You like sundaes, right? I'll get you one of those on the house. I'll be right back."

"Hey! You're upstaging my pancakes! Get your own kid to spoil," but Luke was already gone. Lorelai stared after him, considering something.

"What?" Rory asked about the strange look on her mother's face.

"Nothing," Lorelai shook her head, returning to the present situation. "Oh! So, funny thing at the wedding!"

"What wedding?"

"Liz and TJ's wedding, what other wedding? They got married, he wore tights." Rory's mouth dropped open. "It was renaissance themed, to erase that look of horror on your face ever so slightly. But, that's not the important part."

"I'm sorry, _that's_ not the funny part of this story? Tell me more about the tights! Wait, mental image. Don't tell me. Carry on with what you were saying."

"So I was helping fix Liz's dress because it got ripped and was stalling the wedding, and when I was in there, I saw this book."

"A book?"

"A book! In Jess' bag. It was just lying out there for all to see. And it wasn't just any book! You know what book it was?"

Rory looked uncomfortable and opened her mouth to say something, but her mother kept going.

"A _self-help_ book! All about _love_ and _communication_ and – why are you looking like that? Is this still a touchy subject?"

"It's nothing. Just, it's not that weird to see a book in Jess' bag is all. He reads."

"Ya, but _that_ book? Isn't it at least a _little_ funny? I mean, it's Jess with the eternal chip on his shoulder, reading about rainbows, little hearts and mushy stuff."

"He reads anything. He probably wasn't paying much attention. Bored or something, I wouldn't read too much into it." Rory got up abruptly.

"Hey, hun, where are you going? I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-"

"No, no, it's nothing. I just – I just remembered I was supposed to meet Lane today. So I'd better go before she realizes how late I am. Tell Luke thanks for the sundae, but I'm full. You eat it."

"Oh-okay."

Rory left. Lorelai sat bewildered for a moment and stared into her coffee cup.

"Am I the only one that finds this book funny?" she said to herself. She took a sip and nodded to the salt-shaker. "It's the twilight zone, I tell you."

* * *

"You did WHAT?"

"Shh, _Lane_ , you don't have to yell it!"

"But you – _did_ – With... _Jess_? What was he even doing there? In your _dorm_?" She stopped, "was it on the boxes?"

"No! It was not on the boxes, it was in the bed like normal people!"

"Hm. A shame. I always thought he would go for something more daring. But go on. Details!"

"I don't know. He just kind of showed up. I think he was here for his mom's wedding or something. He asked me to 'come away with him'."

"As in, run away with him?"

"Yeah. Just like that, out of the blue. Run away with him."

"How romantic! So why didn't you?"

"Well obviously, I couldn't, I mean there are _so_ many reasons. My mom for one, and Yale, and-"

"Ya, ya, ya, we get the Miss Responsible list. Skip to the juicy part. How did you end up... _you know_?"

"I- " She thought for a moment. "I don't really know. It just sort of happened. One minute we were yelling at each other, the next minute he tried to leave again, and I just – I didn't want him to. So we..."

"Wow. I mean – _wow_. If I could just take a smidgen of the magic romance juice you bathed in as a child, I would be one lucky woman."

"Well don't get too excited. He still left."

"What do you mean he left?"

"Well, I woke up, and... he was gone. No note, no explanation. Just – I can't believe I fell for it again. I do this every time. I always get sucked in by him only to be more disappointed and hurt in the end."

"So there was no sign of the man? Nothing? How do you know he was _gone,_ gone?"

"Lane, his car was gone. His... _clothes_ were gone," she winced. "He just – he was gone, okay? It's not that hard to imagine, he's a regular Houdini, remember?"

"But why would he go to all the trouble of showing up again after all this time if he would just – leave?"

Rory shrugged. "How am I supposed to know? Maybe he got the closure he wanted and it's all he needed," she crossed her arms over her chest.

"Hey, don't think like that. Jess is many things, but a pig is not one of them." She corrected herself, "at least, not where you're concerned anyways. I don't know, Rory, I just don't buy it. He was always so different with you, so... you know?"

"All I know is that he's left me twice before, and now again after what should have been something really special. The track record speaks for itself."

"Hmm. I guess. Have you told Lorelai?"

"No, not yet. I feel kind of weird about it. She never really ... well, anyways. I will. Soon. Now let's talk about something else. This is just making me more confused. How's the band?"

Lane sighed.


	3. Distractions Never Hurt Anyone

Rory greeted the guests out front of the Dragonfly with her mother like a proud parent. Everything was coming together, everything her mom had worked for. The guests were all very cheerful and excited. Lorelai was beaming and chatting easily, evading even Taylor's grating inquiries.

Rory could tell that it was all a very good cover, though. Her mother was working very hard to keep the calm, collected exterior. Inside, she was a basket-case. If something were to rocket her out of her centred act, she would fall apart.

This was why Rory still hadn't told her mother what had happened at Yale yet. It was just... difficult. She didn't want to realize how big of a deal it was, and her mother's inevitable explosion on the topic would only make her feel that much worse. She just needed to get through this evening, and she would tell her when things calmed down. No big deal.

Tom spoke behind them at the door. "They're out back and I already sent Dean in to start putting 'em up." The lost doors were finally dealt with. Rory's ears perked up at Dean's name.

"I'll be right back!" She smiled brightly at her mother so her mood wouldn't be so obvious. She ran inside. Things were so unsettled last time, she wanted to at least thank Dean for all the trouble he went to. He'd only been helping her out and she felt bad for making him leave in such a bad mood. She hadn't been able to get hold of him yet, so this was her best chance. She was heading upstairs to the doors when she heard him come in the back.

"Hi," she said meekly.

"Hey," Dean struggled with the door. "I have to get these upstairs."

"Can't we talk?"

"What about?"

"Thank you for picking me up the other day. I know I've already said it a thousand times, but you were a lifesaver."

"It was nothing," he said curtly.

"It wasn't nothing, it was huge. It was a very big deal, and I'm very thankful." She paused, waiting for a reaction. He wasn't looking at her and oozed bitterness with every fibre. There was no point playing this game anymore, so she just asked, "why are you so mad?"

"I'm not mad, I'm working" he retorted.

"I left you three messages, you didn't answer any of them. You blew me off at Luke's today. You won't look me in the eye."

He rolled his eyes and turned towards her, making a show of looking her in the eyes. "I have to go."

She bit her lip, not wanting him to storm off. "He left." She wanted him to know. She hoped she was hiding how painful it was to say those words, but she thought it might make him come back to her side a little knowing that Jess wasn't in the picture. Anymore.

"That's great Rory, I left too. I guess we can both take orders." She really didn't like this. He shouldn't be so upset!

"But- I didn't ask him to come. I _did_ ask you to come, remember?" They shouldn't be focusing so much on Jess. He clearly didn't want to be involved, but Dean was always there and always loyal no matter what. She needed support right now, and Dean was being so difficult!

"I know-" he stops. "I just-"

"What? Why are you so mad?"

He looks down, a little embarrassed. "I thought you were... back with him, or something."

Rory looked away and paused for a moment. "No. I'm not, back with him." _He left._

"Well I thought you were."

"Well I'm not. But even if I was _back with him_ ," she noted she was saying 'back with him' funny and made a mental note to say less about him, focus more on Dean, "why would it bother _you_ so much?"

"I don't like him."

"Okay."

"And I, I don't want you with him."

"Right. Because, he doesn't treat me right. Right?"

"Right."

"And, you wouldn't want me to be with someone that doesn't treat me right, because... you're my friend, right?"

"Right." She suddenly realizes he's too close. She doesn't react to it though, which surprised her. "I'm your friend." He leans in, but she turns when she sees Tom walking down the hallway out of the corner of her eye.

"Dean! How're we doing with those doors?"

"We're doing fine, Tom," Dean nodded. Rory looked uncomfortable but didn't say anything. Dean looked embarrassed, like he was about to yell at Rory. Instead he grabbed the door and walked away.

* * *

A siren wailed on the freeway. Jess sighed and shut off the blaring music as he pulled his car to the side. He opened the glove compartment.

"May I see your licence and registration, please?" Jess handed them to the officer, keeping his eyes straight ahead, hoping this whole exchange wouldn't take too long.

"Do you know how fast you were going?"

"No, sir," he said. "But I'm guessing it was too fast."

The officer leaned in too close to the window and sniffed as Jess spoke. "Your eyes are a little blood shot there. Trouble sleeping?"

"It's been a long drive. I'm in a rush, so I didn't bother with a motel," he shrugged. "Just kept straight on through."

The officer nodded and wrote on a pad of paper. "Where you headed?"

"Canada," Jess said off the top of his head. "My Aunt's dog got attacked by a moose."

"A moose, huh? I hear they can be pretty dangerous."

"Ya, Bullwinkle fooled us all," Jess said, starting to lose patience. "Listen, is this little chat part of the deal here? I am really in a hurry, so can you just write the ticket or something and send me on my way?"

The officer looked up from his pad of paper and gave him a long hard look. "Can you pop the trunk for me please, sir?"

"Geez," Jess muttered under his breath and bent to push the lever. The officer searched his face carefully for another moment and then went to the back of the car.

Jess leaned back and tapped his hands on the wheel impatiently. He'd been driving since he left Luke's with the exception of stopping to pick up some food half a day in. The nachos and soda would last him another day at least, then he'd have to stop again. Probably at night. He'd also have to sleep at some point, he realized.

Maybe he'd stop and get a book. He hadn't read for a while. The music and the mindless driving was helping him stay numb, but every so often a song would come on that would remind him of – well, he'd have to change it. Which wasn't ideal. He needed something he could entirely lose himself in and he couldn't very well read and drive. Distractions. That's what he was ready for now. In the morning he'd get a book in whatever town came first and he'd stay long enough to finish the book.

The officer came back up front and handed him the ticket. "There's a motel a couple miles down the way. I suggest you stop," he said like it wasn't really a suggestion. "I'm sure your aunt can wait a little if it's so important."

"Right."

The officer left with a polite nod, "Watch your speed, son."

Jess rolled his eyes and threw the ticket and his information on the seat next to him. When the car behind him merged back into traffic, he turned his music back up to full blast and headed out again. Numbness still worked for now.

* * *

"I'm sorry I didn't talk to you about it first. I know I promised I would, but I swear I didn't know that this was going to happen. I mean, I didn't know he was going to show up tonight, and it just happened. It's awful for you to find out like this. I know, but. Everything's okay! I'm okay. And we were, y'know, safe. So all those Trojan Man jokes all these years really apparently stuck. And I'm lucky too, because Dean, he's... well aren't you glad that it was with someone who's _good_ and that really loves me?"

"But he's married."

Rory tried to explain that away. It was a small detail, and of course it _had_ to be a small detail because this was Dean. Dean was a _good_ person, he always did the _right_ thing. He wouldn't have done what he did with Rory tonight if all the details hadn't been sorted out first.

But the more Lorelai talked, the more Rory's resolve began to falter.

"Hey, he was my boyfriend first!" She tried to defend herself weakly.

"But you dumped him, you rejected him. You picked someone else."

"Stop it!" How could she bring _him_ up now? "I hate you for ruining this for me!"

Rory finally collapsed outside, clutching the telephone. None of this was working out the way it should have. She was so confused and out of her element. She'd been looking for something safe without realizing what she was doing. She needed something to stamp out the huge mistake she'd made with Jess, but she ended up making an even bigger one.

Lorelai came up behind her and put a hand on her back tentatively. Rory leaned towards her, sobbing into her mother's arms.

They sat on the front lawn just holding each other for what felt like hours until Rory slowly began to calm down.

Finally she whispered, "Mom."

Lorelai whispered back, "Ya, hun?" She was scared. She had never seen her daughter so devastated.

"I slept with Jess."

Lorelai paused. Very few times in her life was she ever found speechless, but this was definitely one of them.

"He showed up at my dorm and asked me to come with him. I wouldn't!" she clarified for her mother. "We yelled and then... we weren't yelling anymore. And I thought it was great at the time, but then-" her voice caught. "Mom, he left again. In the morning. He wasn't there, and I knew I'd been _so_ stupid for not knowing he would do that to me again. I guess I wasn't thinking and I just went for what felt right. I just- I screwed up."

Lorelai was still stunned, listening to her daughter pour her heart out. "Sweetie, I'm so sorry."

Rory waited for the storm of anger in her mother to start up again. "Well?"

"What? Well, what?"

"Where's the 'I told you so'? You've been waiting years to say it about him, and here's your big chance and you're not saying anything."

"I-I'm just stunned, I think. First Dean and then _Jess_. Wow." She couldn't believe how much she'd missed in her daughter's life while she'd been so busy focusing on her own stuff. "I should have noticed something was up with you. I just never stopped with the Inn opening." She sighed and looked her daughter in the eyes, "I'm sorry."

"No, it's not your fault. I should have told you sooner. I didn't want you to worry, and then this whole thing with Dean just made it all blow up in my face," she sniffed.

"Did you want it to happen with Dean?"

"I don't know. I hadn't really thought about it. I _like_ Dean. I think he's a good guy, and he loves me. And I love him. I think. But, I don't know. It's not like we planned it."

Lorelai sucked in a breath. "You want to know what I think?" Rory looked up expectantly. Her eyes were so sad and confused and innocent that it broke Lorelai's heart to see her in such pain. "I don't think this was ever really about Dean at all."

"I don't know," Rory said quietly. Wasn't it about Dean? He was there for her, he loved her. He proved that he always would. He was everything she needed. But then, he was everything she needed _Jess_ to be. "I guess not," she closed her eyes and prepared herself to fend off the next wave of pain.

Lorelai held her close, trying to be the barrier between her daughter and the hurtful world. They sat in silence for a few moments.

"Rory," she finally whispered. "Can I tell you something?" It was time for her daughter's mourning to take a break. A smile itched at the corner of her mouth.

"Sure," she said apprehensively.

"I kissed Luke."


	4. Look At Yourself

Jess sat in the darkness for what felt like forever. He'd already convinced himself to leave about four different times, but he knew he would stay until he saw her. His heart wouldn't stop racing, which made the situation all the more irritating.

He was still surprised to be at the house in front of him. He didn't believe Luke when he'd called asking where he could find her.

"I don't know, Jess, is it really necessary? She's moved on, you've moved on. Why open up that can of worms again?"

"This has nothing to do with any of that. Just tell me where I can reach her. I'm in town anyway."

"I think this is a bad idea."

"What? Is she at a high security dorm or something? Just tell me, I promise it's just a quick visit. You won't even hear about it from your girlfriend later, that's how quick and painless it will be."

Luke sighed on the other end of the line. "You're right, I won't hear about it."

"Okay, so?"

"She's at her grandparents'."

"Her _grandparents'?"_

"Yep. For a few months now. She and Lorelai had a pretty big fight. Jess, be _careful,_ okay _?_ "

"Aren't I always?" His uncle scoffed on the other end. "Well thanks. I'll drop by to see you soon too. Bye."

* * *

Her car finally drove up the driveway, and he held his breath. It was now or never. He didn't know how she'd react to seeing him, so he walked up to the gate quietly.

She turned and saw him. His heart leapt into his throat. She was more beautiful than he remembered. She looked older, more mature almost.

"Jess," she looked shocked.

"Hey," he said, walking through the gate, trying to sound calm.

"Hey!" Her face brightened, to his relief. "I-" she stopped and shook her head. He waited. "Sorry, that-that wasn't a sentence."

"I got the gist." He walked closer and stuck his hands in his pockets.

"What are you doing here?" She looked so shocked, he suddenly wished he'd given her some warning first.

"I got a job. Professional driveway skulker," he tried joking to lighten the mood.

"Pays good?"

"Ya, but the hours suck."

"Jess..?" She smiled brightly at him, lost for words, but clearly happy to see him.

"I'm in town on a little business," he laughed. "All nice and _above_ board."

"How'd you know where to find me?"

He shrugged, "Luke. I shook it out of him. He wasn't sure if it was okay."

She considered for half a second. "It's okay!" She smiled brightly again. God, he didn't realise how much he missed that smile! "You look good. The years don't seem to have hardened you."

"Ya, you look good too." He bites his lips for a second, trying to hide how much he means those words. Then he remembered why he was there. "I know this is kind of weird, but, there's actually something I wanted to tell you – show you, actually," he clarified so he wouldn't scare her off like the last few times he dropped in on her to _tell_ her something. He noticed she kept glancing up to the window. "I can come back another time."

"No, it's just, ah, we're kind of exposed here. Her window's right there."

"Whose?"

"My grandma. Want to come in?"

"Sure,"

"Ya, come on. Just be careful. She's a very light sleeper."

They crept carefully through the house. He couldn't help but find it all very amusing, despite how alert she was to the dangers of her grandmother waking up.

He walked through the door to her bedroom and stopped, a little appalled at how pink and frilly everything was. "Casa Rory," he said, trying his best to keep the sneer out of his voice. "Hm."

She grabbed a pillow and pressed it against the opening to the door. "So our voices don't carry."

"Very prudent."

"This is not really _my_ taste," she said, suddenly embarrassed about how different her life looked from the outside. They exchanged small talk. He asked about her life. The more she told him, the more uncomfortable she felt, though she tried to hide it. He kept looking more and more disappointed with her. She asked about his life, and he told her he was living in Philadelphia. He seemed happy. She was rambling a little, trying to find her ground in the conversation when he cut her off.

"Are you nervous?"

She let out her breath and nodded sheepishly, "a little. It's... been a long time."

"I'm a little nervous too," he admitted. Before the moment could linger, he turned to his backpack and pulled something out. "So I didn't just come here to chat, I wanted to show you something."

"Right, you said that."

"And, I didn't think you'd believe it if I didn't show it to you in person," he handed her a small book.

"Well, colour me curious." She lifted the book closer to examine it. "A Book. 'The Subsect'. Written by _Jess Mariano_?" She looked at him hard.

"It's no misprint," he smiled sheepishly.

"You wrote a book?" She almost accused. All sense of tact was momentarily out the window as she let the new information sink in. It took her a moment to realize how big this was. She was in awe. As he tried talking the book down, she got more and more excited for him.

They both stopped when she thought she heard something outside the bedroom.

"It's kinda late, I should go," he said.

"It is kinda late." She got up with him, and they stood for a few moments.

"So I just basically wanted to show you that, and tell you... tell you that I couldn't have done it without you."

She looked at him carefully, overcome with the compliment. "Thanks." They both stared at each other, remembering glimpses of the good times.

"I'm going to be around for a couple days. Can we talk again?" he asks. "Preferably above a whisper."

"Ya!" She says eagerly, coming out of the spell. "I'd like that. How about tomorrow night?"

"Eight okay?"

"Ya."

"Okay. I'll sneak out on my own," he grinned to himself.

* * *

Jess threw pebbles at her window, hoping to make her laugh when she realized he was there. The front door opened, startling him. He nearly ran from Mrs. Gilmore before he realized it was just Rory. She still laughed.

"What are you doing?"

"I didn't know if it was okay to ring or not," he whispered loudly.

"She's not here!"

"She's not?" He was disappointed that all of his scheming was for nothing.

"She's playing bridge tonight." Rory suppressed her laughter at how sad he looked.

He tossed his pebbles back into the fountain, "Good. I parked on the street so she wouldn't see!"

"You're very good at covert ops."

"Years of practice," he said with a wink. "So where do you want to go?"

"I don't know, I don't know the area that well."

"You _live_ here." He shook his head mockingly at her as she tried to explain her hermit-like tendencies. They discussed a little where they wanted to go, and finally came to some sort of agreement.

"Steer me to the college district, I'll find us something funky!" Jess said with a grin.

"Sounds good." They walked to the street where his car was, and both climbed in.

* * *

The restaurant was small and dimly lit. There were circular lamps in bright colours dotted throughout, hidden behind old knick knacks and on a dusty old piano. They found a seat in a corner at the back, settling in comfortably.

"I had no idea this place even existed! I must have driven past it a thousand times."

"Well, I do have radar for finding these things. I somehow get drawn to the places in the world that no one looks twice at."

"Give your funky-compass a pat on the back, my friend. This place is rad!"

"Does anyone even _say_ 'rad' anymore?"

"Shush, you, I'm hep!"

A waitress walked up to them with black-and-white paper menus. She had a side pony-tail, thick glasses and a tight skirt. She smiled brightly at Jess, "Welcome to Janey's. The specials are at the top of the menu. Can I get you anything to drink to start?"

Jess smiled back, noticing how Rory poorly hid her amusement. The waitress was lowering her shoulders to better position the view to her cleavage. "Two coffees would be great for now, thanks."

"Two coffees. You sure you don't want anything a little more _special_ , hun?" She winked at him. Rory covered her mouth trying not to laugh and pretended to cough. Jess bit his lip, trying not to laugh with her.

"Just the coffees, thanks." The waitress left, giving Rory a scowl on her way.

"Oh man, I think she's going to kill me!" Rory finally let out a laugh. "You better leave her a number or something. Did you see how she was looking at you?"

"Naw, she just wants a tip. They're all like that."

"She _winked_ at you. I've never seen such a smooth wink. You should leave her _something_ just as a congratulations for mastering that talent. It's really hard, you know."

"Why, do you go winking at strange men too?"

"Of course not. I'm a lady of a certain class." He laughed. "Besides, look how hard it is," she blinked furiously a few times, making him laugh harder. "This is not sexy. This is not smooth. I would attract attention from the police, and that's about it."

"Okay, stop, stop I believe you. Don't hurt yourself!"

The girl came back with two large mugs of coffee, one filled decidedly more than the other. Rory hid her smile. "You ready to order, babe?" the lady said to Jess again. He motioned to Rory to start.

"Oh, uh, thanks. I'll have..." she looked at the menu for the first time. She had no idea what half the things were. "What exactly are hemp noodles and peanut sauce?"

The waitress rolled her eyes and spoke like she was talking to a 5 year old. "It's like a Thai dish. Everything's made _organically_ from the chef's home garden. You can't get anything else like it in the city."

"Oh, um okay. I'll have one of those then. Thanks."

The waitress scribbled something quickly on her pad of paper, and turned to Jess, beaming, "And for you, cutie?"

Jess looked at Rory and winked, "I'll just have one of those too." The waitress popped a bubble of gum and walked off to place their order. The two quietly snickered into their plates.

"So," Rory started.

"So?" He leaned closer, folding his arms on the table.

"So, I started your book," she smiled brightly.

"No, already? You couldn't have waited till I was out of town?" Jess looked away, a deeper shade washing over his face.

"No, I couldn't. I started as soon as you left. And I'm only half done, so don't be too embarrassed."

"Who's embarrassed? I gave it to you, didn't I?" He still wouldn't meet her eye though.

"Jess, it's amazing! I'm riveted! I'm at the part where Miles just escaped and has the whole area looking for him. I don't know what to expect, it's so original!"

"Ya, well, thanks, I guess." He covered his mouth with his hands.

"How did you come up with the idea?"

He shrugged and rubbed his arm absently, "I don't know, to be honest. Life got pretty rough there for a while, especially after... well. I ran out of money for books, and I was never in a place long enough to buy all the library memberships, so I just... came up with something on my own I guess. Why not, you know?"

"Ya, that makes sense. So you travelled a lot?"

"I guess I did. Took a few jobs here and there. Met some really interesting people. Stars Hollow is officially not the weirdest place I've seen anymore, if it makes you feel better."

"I never doubted!"

"So when I was ready to settle down in New York, Liz wasn't there anymore. Luke and I didn't leave on great terms, so I just decided to keep going and ended up in Philly. I really liked it, and then I met the guys at Truncheon, and here I am. It all happened quickly, to be honest. I'm still kind of reeling."

"Wow. You have lived, Jess."

He nodded, "you could definitely say that."

"I still can't believe you wrote a whole book. I'm so proud of you. The biggest thing I've done is... well, I stole a boat."

"You what?"

"I stole a boat. I know. It was a really bad time in my life and I wasn't really thinking. I don't know. I really regret it. It's sort of what started this whole thing with my mom."

"I can't believe it. Rory Gilmore, criminal master-mind?"

"Oh, there was definitely nothing masterful about it. I got caught almost immediately and got into a lot of trouble. I- It was not one of my finer moments."

Jess pursed his lips, surprised. This was not the same girl he thought he was coming back to.

A clunk on the table notified them that the waitress had arrived with their food. "There you are, enjoy," she mumbled and stalked off back to the bar.

The plates were covered in a mud-green goo with thin, stiff brown logs stuck in here and there. It smelled like marmite. Rory sniffed cautiously and then took a tentative bite. After a few moments of trying to chew, she picked up her napkin and removed to rubbery noodle from her mouth.

"Aw, I think we should have gone with the veggie burgers. This is pretty bad," she laughed awkwardly.

Jess was still staring at her with a puzzled look on his face.

"What?" she asked. "Do I have something in my teeth?"

"You're different," he accused.

"I'm sorry?"

"You're different. You've changed."

"Well, probably. It's been a long time, Jess. You've changed too."

"Ya, but the last time I saw you-"

Her eyes flashed in warning. "Go on. The last time you saw me, what?"

"You were going places. Now you're stealing boats?"

"Ya, well, you were going places too, weren't you? You went really fast if I remember. I barely had time to open my eyes and you were gone again."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"You know what it means, Jess." She stood up suddenly.

"What is your problem?"

"It's been great catching up, Jess. It really has. But I don't need a lecture about how crappy my life's become compared to how great yours is. I'm glad for you, I really am, but this is just too much. I don't deserve this from you. Not after you break my heart _every_ time I see you."

Jess stood up with her. "I'm sorry, but don't give me all the credit here. Who walked out last time, cuz it sure as hell wasn't me."

"Just because I wouldn't run off with you doesn't mean I was-"

"Excuse me," the waitress popped in, beaming again. Rory and Jess stopped, glaring at each other. "I'm sorry, but is there a problem here?"

"No, there's no problem," Jess said.

"Great," the waitress' smile softened, not entirely sure if she should believe him or stick around to see if she'd get her opening. Rory glared at her some more, and the waitress decided to watch from afar.

"I think I'm ready to go home now," Rory said.

"Fine." Jess took a twenty out of his pocket and threw it on the table.

"Actually, that comes to thirty-two twenty nine," the waitress chirped from the bar. Jess rolled his eyes and threw down another twenty.

"Where are _you_ going?" Rory snapped.

"I'm your ride, aren't I? Just get in the car and then I'll _run away_ again for you."

The two marched out into the car, both slamming their doors. They drove in silence. Rory turned the stereo on, only to have a sweet melancholy tune blast from the speakers. Jess pushed stop, and changed the CD player to a rock station as fast as he could, still glaring ahead. She pretended not to notice.

* * *

They pulled into the driveway and he waited for her to get out. She paused, lost in thoughts, and then leaned over to turn the radio off.

"What do you mean you weren't the one who left last time?"

"What? Rory, let's not start this again, okay?"

"No, what do you mean? Because I was the one that woke up to an empty room. I'm just curious as to how this translates into you _not_ being the one that left." She was breathing hard, still furious.

"What are you talking about? I came in and you'd packed everything up. _You_ were gone."

"You came in?" She stopped, more baffled than ever. "Where did you _go_?"

"I went to get us coffee," he looked down, not sure whether he should be yelling or if he should be embarrassed.

"Coffee?" She was dumbfounded. Her memories flooded back to her in a rush of pain and confusion.

"Ya, Yale was all closed up, so I had to search around."

"Oh," Rory got very quiet. "I thought you had..."

"Nope. Not that time, at least."

They looked at each other in the darkness, realizing the mistake they had both made. Neither knew what to do. So much time had passed, so much heartache. Slowly, clumsily, they began to inch towards each other.

A car pulled into the driveway, making them jump apart.

Rory leapt out of Jess' car as fast as she could, terrified her grandmother had come home early. Jess just stayed seated in the car for a moment, wrapping his head around what had nearly happened. Then he got out, preparing himself to face the wrath of Emily Gilmore.

"Logan!" Rory said to the blond guy getting out of his Porsche.

"Am I interrupting something?" He looked intimidating and far too good-looking to be of any substance.

"No! Hey, when did you get back?" She forced a grin on her face, and Jess knew how thin it was.

"A couple hours ago." The man glared at Jess, who looked on, perturbed.

"Oh, I thought you were getting back tomorrow."

"Thought I'd surprise you, Ace."

"Well, I'm glad you did, because you get to meet my old friend! Jess, this is Logan, my boyfriend." She looked down, "Logan this is Jess. He's in from out of town." The two men stared at each other, not saying anything. They smiled at Rory when she looked at them in turn. The silence crept on.

Logan offered a hand to Jess, finally. "Nice to meet you." Jess shook his hand and nodded. Logan put an arm around Rory and smiled politely.

"So how long have you two known each other?"

"A while," Jess said, looking at Rory.

"You date?" His smile got wider, more plastic.

"Yes, we used to date." Rory glared at Logan.

"Ah, no beating around the bush, I like your style. So what do you do, Jess?"

"A little bit of this, a little bit of that." Jess was losing patience, ready to leave.

"He writes! Jess wrote a book."

"Oh. You penned the great American novel, Jess?"

"Wasn't quite that ambitious."

"So what are we talking here? Short novel? Kafka length, or longer. Dos Pasos? Tolstoy? Or longer? Robert Musil? Proust? I'm not throwing you with these names, am I?"

"You seem very obsessed with length."

"You should send me a copy."

"Ya, sure. Where I do I send it? The blond _dick_ at Yale?"

"Jess!"

"Listen, it's getting late, I should head out," Jess turned, past his limit.

"Ya, sounds good, man. Rory, hop in. I'm taking you out." Logan got in his car, waiting. Jess turned and walked back to his car.

"Jess, wait." Rory ran after him.

"It was a mistake to come here," he said angrily in Logan's direction.

"I'm so sorry Jess, he's not normally like that." She looked away, clearly upset.

"You know, that guy's a jerk. I can't believe you're with – we used to make fun of guys like that."

"Yes, today he was a jerk, but he's not normally. He's just tired, he was travelling all day, and-"

"What the hell is going on?" He almost yelled.

"I told you, he's tired, and his family's bugging him right now, and-"

"Not with him. _Screw_ him. I mean with _you_. What's going on with _you_?"

"What do you mean?" She looked stunned.

"You know what I mean. I _know_ you. I know you better than _anyone_. This isn't you."

"I don't know," Rory glared, getting defensive again.

"What are you doing? Living at your grandparents' place, being in the D.A.R, no Yale. _Why_ did you drop out of _Yale_?"

"It's complicated!" Her anger bubbled back up.

"It's not, it's not complicated."

"You don't know!"

"This isn't you! What's going on Rory?" He waited for her to answer. She was ready to yell back, but she stopped. He was right. About everything. This wasn't her, and she knew it. She'd been pretending for so long, slowly becoming her grandmother's perfect pet that she'd forgotten who she was and the things she'd worked for. The people she loved.

"I don't know," she said, quietly. "I don't know."

He stopped, catching his breath. "Listen, maybe this was a bad time. I'll see you later maybe, when things are better." He turned and got in his car. "Happy birthday, by the way," he said through the open window. "Wasn't that a few weeks ago?" He smiled softly then turned to the road.

She sat there stunned and watched him drive off.

Logan rolled down his own window and called over to her. "Ace, you coming?"

She took a breath. "Go away, Logan!"

"What, did he say something to you? Forget him! I'm taking you out somewhere nice."

"No, Logan, I'm not going anywhere with you. Just go. Go home." She was tired, and she had a lot on her mind. She really didn't have the energy to deal with him right now.

Rory turned on her heel and walked back into the cold old house. She leaned against the door and heard Logan's car drive away slowly into the darkness.


	5. A Perfectly Muddled Mess

Rory looked at the invitation. It's not that she hadn't thought of him in the last few weeks at all, it's just that her life had been so hectic since that time. She didn't know how she'd even begin a conversation with him if she got the chance. And yet, holding the flyer with the address and a quick note scribbled over the ad, here was the chance.

She wanted to show him she'd put her life back together. She didn't want him thinking she'd fallen apart completely. Why it was so important to her was hard to say. She almost owed him for the slap in the face that spurred her back towards reality last time. But was that all?

What would she say about Logan? She'd been struggling to keep her life with him normal lately. Logically, everything he'd told her about the bridesmaids made perfect sense. He didn't intentionally mean to hurt her, so staying with him was the only thing to do. Of course she still cared for him. He clearly cared for her with all of his displays to win her back the past few weeks. So why couldn't she look at him still?

The problem was she felt cheated. No matter what her head said, she felt like a victim. She didn't like it. This side of the coin was too uncomfortable for her. It had been so easy with Dean – forgetting the other person existed because she was less important than the happiness Rory felt with him, even in that short time. It had been so easy, almost an afterthought. Like she was now. An afterthought.

Was that the answer? Maybe they just needed equal footing again. Make him the afterthought, and they'd be even. That would be easiest.

Holding the flyer with the address, Rory headed out to her car without another thought.

* * *

He saw her sitting, waiting. She'd been there so long that everyone else had left. It was just the two of them. He felt nervous, but he took his chance. He walked over and pulled up a stool.

"You don't have to read it again," he laughed, realizing she was going through his book.

"I know I don't." She smiled proudly.

"There's _so_ many things I would change!"

"Like what?"

"I would keep... the back cover. Everything else goes."

She laughed dismissively and turned closer to him. "You know why I love your book?"

"Why?"

"It doesn't remind me of anything. It's not a rip-off. It's just you."

"High praise, Miss _Yale Editor_."

"Yeah," she looked down feeling a bit guilty for the hint of pride welling up over the fact that he already knew about Yale. "I don't get to write as much as I'd like. I'm mostly assigning, and motivating, hand-holding, rewriting."

"Yeah, and you love it. Every minute of it. C'mon, tell me you don't!"

She grinned, "I do. I do love it. It's exciting!" She realized she never actually celebrated this success with anyone else. She'd been given the position as a fluke, and then got kicked out of her apartment. Moving in with Logan immediately seemed like the bigger deal at the time... being excited was just pushed aside.

"You look happier than when I saw you last."

"I am," she nodded, biting her lip. She _was_ feeling happier, but it only just snuck up on her. Lately she hadn't been feeling this happy doing anything but working on the paper or chatting with her mom.

"You 'fixed' everything?" He looked so careful.

"Yeah, everything's fixed." She went back to school. She became an editor. She made up with her mom. _Don't think about Logan!_

Jess smiled and leaned in. "I'm glad you're here."

"Me too." _Keep the smile on your face._ Her heart was racing. _No, thinking about Logan will only make you feel guilty about this! That's not the point here!_

Jess came towards her carefully. He kissed her gently at first, afraid it wasn't okay. She kissed back. She started to lose herself, remembering how well they worked together despite the odds, realizing that they were slowly meeting in the middle. Feeling more confident, he reached out to her, wanting to pull her closer. Suddenly, her stomach dropped. What was she doing? She hadn't expected it at all, but Logan wasn't the one she was feeling guilty about. She pulled back and broke away, starting to feel sick.

"What?" He asked, his voice thick with confusion.

She got up and turned, "I'm sorry."

"About what?"

"Ah, about coming here like this." She started pacing, trying to wrap her mind around the awful sick feeling. "I just got the flyer, and I don't know, I just wanted to see your place, but then... this." He shook his head, still perplexed. "It's not fair to you, I'm such a jerk."

"I don't know what you're talking about." He wanted her to slow down. He thought they were on the same page. But she was still in her ranting mode, so he waited.

"And I couldn't even cheat on him the way he cheated on me," the sick feeling wasn't going away.

Jess' ears perked up at that. " _Who_! Who cheated on you?" He was suddenly very protective. But she wouldn't look him in the eye. His face started to feel a bit numb as realization struck. "That _guy?_ "

She nodded, barely. He stopped, feeling like an idiot. He covered his mouth with his hand. "You're still with him." It wasn't a question.

"Yeah." At least she had the decency to look devastated. But he'd _asked_!

"I thought everything was _fixed_." He began to feel angry, realizing he'd done nothing wrong this time.

She shrugged. "Everything but him."

"I _hate_ this." It should have been the perfect reunion he'd been waiting for all these years, but the timing was off _again_ , because of another ass Rory was hung up on.

"You should, I'm sorry."

 _Why is she sorry?_ _I pushed myself on her._ But he realized he'd taken all the right signs. "You came here, alone, to _Philadelphia_ ," he thought out loud.

She shrugged, "he was out of town."

So she was leading him on? "I don't deserve this, Rory."

"No, you don't! You don't deserve it!" She felt terrible and confused and sick. "I just-" she paused, trying to regain control."I'm in love with him." She looked defeated. "Despite all the bad he's done, I can't help it. I'm in love with him."

Jess felt like he was swallowing sand. He didn't want to hear this. "Love, huh?"

"Yeah," she said a little lighter, shrugging, trying to make it seem like a small confession.

"I guess I'll call Matthew's poet. Have him explain love to me. Poets know all about it, right?" His voice sounded dead, but a touch of sarcasm was there. Rory crossed her arms over her chest.

"Supposed to," she shrugged again. "Well, I guess I'd better go."

He nodded towards the door, wanting this situation to be over. "Okay."

"I'm _so_ sorry I came here."

"I'm uh," he stopped himself from saying _not_. "It's what it is. You. Me." They both looked down. "Where'd you park?"

"Oh, I'm right outside," she smiled nonchalantly, which hit him even harder. She started walking away like everything had been fixed, and in that moment, he really didn't like her.

"Just-" he called out, making her stop and turn at the door. "One clarification, if you don't mind." She nodded and waited, a little afraid. "At the risk of sounding like a complete ass," he collected himself. "Why him?"

Rory looked down and took a deep breath. She really was going to be sick soon. "I don't know what you want me to say."

"I know I don't have the perfect track record," Jess tried hard to keep his anger in check. "But he _cheats_ on you, and you go running back to him with open arms? I would _never-_ "

"Stop, please. Logan and I-" she searched for the right words. "It's _really_ complicated."

"What, and we're not?" He took a step closer.

"You and I are _over_ , Jess, it's different." She was pleading for him to stop.

He nodded to the ground, feeling the sneer curl up his lips. "That's funny, 'cause from where I stand, it doesn't really look that way." He lifted his head, seeing the anger begin to boil in her eyes too. "A few weeks ago, if your _boyfriend_ hadn't shown up, would it still be over? And what about just now, Rory? You drive for hours, and you kiss me back, and you still think it's over? Tell me you felt _nothing_ just now."

"It doesn't matter what I felt, Jess, it was a mistake. I _love_ Logan!" She wanted to shake him.

"Yeah, you keep saying that, and yet here you are."

She glared at him and opened the door. "I have to go."

He rushed after her before she could get too far. "You want to know what I _do_ know about love?" he says from the doorway, catching her arm. She met his gaze angrily. He looked over her shoulder, making sure no one was watching, and he dropped his voice to a whisper. "I know that I haven't been able to get you out of my head since I met you. It's been _years_ , Rory. And no matter where I go, or who I meet, or how many times I beat it into myself that I'm not good enough for you, you're still in my head! I can't escape you! I think I'm a crazy person!"

Rory stood, stunned. "You're not-"

"So I worked at it," Jess continued, not wanting to lose momentum. "It might be the biggest cliché in the book, but I knew I would never be worth anything until I meant something to you. And here I am."

"Stop it!" she clutched her head, overwhelmed and confused.

"I love you, Rory. I've only ever said it to one person, and I'll always mean it," he looked at her hard, "no matter how you feel about me." He finished, biting his lip defensively. He'd finally said it all. He'd finally let it all go, and he felt exposed. He risked a glance at Rory.

Her eyes were flaming. Nearly in tears and furious, she took a step towards him. He flinched, not sure what to expect. She opened her mouth, about to say something, but then changed her mind. She grabbed him by the shirt collar and kissed him angrily on the mouth. He stumbled backwards through the door. He clutched her face, breathing deeply as she pushed him backward. He closed the front door, still holding onto her.

Suddenly, she pushed him away, making him stumble again, confused.

"No!" She pointed at him, keeping the distance between them. Her mind was reeling. "My _God_ , you have the worst timing in the world!" She breathed and started pacing back and forth. "You'll say it _now_! You'll say it as an ambush on the street! You never pick a time when I can say it back!" She yelled. "I'm telling you that I love someone _else_ , and all of a sudden the flood gates are open on your end! This is not _fair."_ She squared off, looking at him right in the eye. "Right now, how can I _possibly_ tell you that I-"

Her words were muffled by him reaching out and pulling her back into the passionate kiss. She kissed back, not thinking. She nearly lost herself again, but then held her hands up at her sides. She pulled away, trying not to touch him.

"This is _not_ how tonight was supposed to go!" she cried. "It was supposed to be fun and _meaningless_! And it would have bugged him even more because it was _you_." He watched her pace, his face darkening. "And then I could have felt better about this whole mess, and been done with it and we could have moved on!"

"So _that's_ the only reason you came, then?" he spat.

"Yes!" Rory said quickly, "I mean no." Jess shifted angrily. "I mean, I have no idea, because I forgot it was _you!_ It could never be meaningless, could it?" He wouldn't look at her, his hands in his pockets. "I can't stop feeling _sick_ about this whole thing, and I'm just being awful." She tried getting him to meet her eye. "I'm _so_ sorry, Jess. You're so much better than this. You've always been there for me in a way no one else has, and I just-"

She reached up and kissed him softly. His whole body was rigid at first, but when she wouldn't let go and tried to deepen it, he relaxed. He pulled her body closer to him. Realizing they were by the couches, they slid down smoothly, and he leaned back, pulling her with him. He brought his hands to the buttons of her jacket and started fumbling.

"W-wait," she murmured. She pulled away abruptly, leaving him catching his breath.

"You want to do this right now or not?" Jess said, trying to keep his voice calm. "'Cause we can! It's probably hours till the guys get back, and you had a plan. I don't see why we can't stick to it."

"Jess, don't," she sobbed.

"No, it's all up to you Rory. Screw what's-his-name, or not. I'm game either way, just _pick_ one!"

"It's not fair! None of this is. I don't know when it all started going wrong!" She wiped her eyes and crossed her arms over her chest. He had no idea when she'd started crying, but there she was, tears burning down her face. "You know, I spent a night in jail? That's right, Me, Rory Gilmore, a jailbird. _And_ I broke up a marriage! Dean and Lindsay. Their divorce, that was because of me! I'm a home-wrecker, and I didn't even _think_ what it was doing to her!"

He watched quietly. He'd never seen her like this before. "And when you came to visit, I was just so _embarrassed_ about what my life had become! And you know I still love him?" she laughed to herself, starting to shake. "You say you weren't good enough for me, but I think the evidence at this point safely proves that the opposite is true. I'm so sorry, I don't even know what I'm doing here!" She covered her face and turned away from him, sobbing.

She felt a soft hand on her back. Jess pulled her into his arms, just hugging her. She buried her face in his shoulder, crying angrily to herself. The past year had been so confusing and overwhelming. Everything had changed, and she knew it wasn't all for the better. She was still trying to put herself back together, though she thought she'd done it already.

Jess held onto her, gently rubbing her back and wiping the hair out of her face. He had no idea what to say, or what he was doing. Honestly, he was a little scared. Slowly, she began to calm down. She sniffed and hiccoughed.

He gave her a squeeze and smiled, "You know, you owe me a new jacket now."

She laughed.

"No, I'm serious, this was the only suit I owned!"

She sniffed and pulled back to look at him, "Can't be much of a loss since your suit came with jeans."

"Nah," he grinned. "I was slowly building it." They smiled softly, at each other. "You okay?"

Rory nodded, looking down. "Um, for now, I think." He nodded, equally as fascinated with his shoes. "I'm really sorry about all of this." She glanced up at him. "I should really get going now, though. I've wasted enough of your time."

"Not really," he shrugged.

"Either way, I should go. Thanks. For everything." She turned and walked to the door. "And again. Sorry."

"You keep saying that," Jess gave her a lopsided grin. "But I have it on pretty good authority you'll be forgiven," he winked. "Eventually."

She smiled, and then left. Jess watched her go. He let out a gush of air he hadn't known he was holding. She was gone again.


	6. Meeting in the Middle

Rory sat in the small cafe, yawning into her laptop. It had been a busy day and late night last night. The front door opened. She perked her head up, checking. But no, it was just more tourists stumbling in for their warm breakfasts. She ducked her head back to her steaming mug of coffee, closing her eyes to savour every caffeine-filled sip.

"Should I leave you two alone?" A husky voice said from behind her.

"Hey! I didn't see you come in," she stood and the two hugged quickly before sitting down at the table.

"Late night last night?" Jess noted the empty coffee mugs scattered around the table and the circles under her eyes she'd tried to cover up.

"You have no idea. I'm still finishing off my article, but it's not quite up to snuff yet."

"Yeah, I heard people in the streets 'till pretty late," he nodded. "You didn't have to stay up with them, did you?"

"Of course I didn't _have_ to," she laughed. "But I got so many notes and quotes, it was worth it! Everyone shouting _Yes We Can_ through the streets for hours– it's so exhilarating, you have no idea!"

Jess leaned back in his chair and admired her. She looked tired but thrilled. "So this is the Rory Gilmore, hard-hitting journalist I've heard so much about," Jess smiled at her.

"The one and the same!"

"How are you liking it?"

"It's fantastic. I've learned so much, and I learn more every day. It's constantly busy, which was tough to get used to at first, but I think I've got the swing of it now. Even today has a tight schedule. There's this thing with a train later where we peruse the suburbs looking for more votes." He liked the way her eyes lit up just talking about it all. "It's been a year next month, you know," She sighed. "I'm really glad you were free when I called. You have no idea how great it is seeing a familiar face."

"I wouldn't miss this. To be honest, I was kind of hoping you'd call. I heard Obama was coming to town, and I hoped I'd get a chance to see you again. It's been a while," they smiled softly at each other.

After a second Jess sat up, breaking the moment with an awkward smile. "I'd offer to cheers the occasion if I had a cup, but you seem to have drained the place of all caffeinated beverages!" he laughed.

"Oh no! I'm so sorry," Rory blushed. "I came in thinking I should get you something too, but I got here pretty early, and I didn't want it to get cold, and then I didn't know what you wanted, and here you are, me babbling on, and you don't have anything, even though we said we'd do coffee!"

"Simmer. I come here all the time. No sweat, I'll just get the usual." He waved someone over, smiled a greeting and ordered the usual. He noticed her staring at him a little slack-jawed. "What?"

"Nothing!" She looked away innocently. "I just never thought I'd see you so settled in a place that you'd be able to order a _usual_. It's so old-man of you."

"Well don't tell Luke. He doesn't need to know how much like him I'm getting. I even bark at customers at the shop once in a while."

"No! You? I can't imagine."

"Yes. I even told someone to go to hell just yesterday. They kept asking if we sold the latest twilight book," he shook his head. "It was rough."

"Aw, poor you. So I guess this means I shouldn't ask if you're a Jacob or an Edward?"

"Very funny. So how are those two?"

"Who? Jacob and Edward? At each others' throats the last I heard. Why?"

Jess glared at her, "I meant Luke and your mom. I got the invitations."

"Oh, right. Yeah, they sent out two save-the-dates just in case. I think it was a bit of an over-kill, but they wanted to make sure it wouldn't interfere with the campaign dates. The June one is if Obama doesn't make the vote as democratic candidate, and late November is if he goes all the way."

"And what is your professional opinion? You know, from the press."

"Well, he's been getting a lot of support lately. He's still a little behind Clinton, but there's definitely time to pull it up. He's got big plans. It's so inspiring seeing him talk. You know, I even met Oprah?"

Jess shook his head, so proud of her. "You're doing really well, Rory."

She looked into her coffee cup, aware of his scrutiny, and enjoying it. "And there I go again, gushing about my life. How about _you_? How's Truncheon doing?"

"It's doing really well actually. Better than any of us expected. We've got a bunch of people signed, and hold events weekly. We're actually starting to run out of space and probably have to expand soon. I'm having trouble convincing the other guys of that, though. They'll come around once they realize there's no room to sip their chai lattes," they both laughed.

"Have you written anything else?"

Jess sighed. "You're not the only one without time. I'm constantly editing and coordinating that I barely have time to get the Zine articles done. But I might have one or two things in the works," he winked, "so you'll have to stay tuned."

"Oh, is it a sequel? You have to tell me you're adding onto the _Subsect._ You can't just leave it like that, and I'm not the only one who thinks so!"

"Oh, I have my own private publicist do I?"

"Let's just say, I may have slipped Oprah one or two things when we met," Rory grinned.

"That would explain why sales went up with single moms all of a sudden. I was curious about that one actually."

"You're welcome."

Just then the warm smell of hot potatoes and bacon wafted over as the waitress brought Jess' food. She placed it in front of him, and to Rory's surprise, pulled up a chair to join them, leaned over and planted a kiss on his lips.

"Surprise!" The red-head flipped her long silky hair as she leaned away from Jess, grinning wildly. "Who's this, hon?" she asked, grabbing a fork and munching on some of Jess' potatoes.

Jess blushed, looking a little uncomfortable. "Hey, uh. This is Rory. She's... Well, she's going to be my Uncle's step-daughter soon I guess."

Rory caught his eye, still a bit surprised. She covered quickly though and leaned across the table, offering her hand and a warm smile to the other girl. "Nice to meet you!"

"You too! I'm Allie, by the way. He has no manners, I swear. I keep trying to pound them into him, but he's as stubborn as a mule sometimes! The best I've done is got him to tuck his shirt in once in a while, and it's been," she paused, looking at Jess. "God, how long has it been now?" she giggled when Jess opened his mouth dully. "Look at me, putting him on the spot like that. Let's see, we started dating last October, so that means..." she thought to herself for a moment. "Almost a year and a half now! You owe me a present soon!" She giggled and stabbed another potato.

"How sweet," Rory smiled pleasantly. "How did you two meet?"

"Well, he'd been coming in here for such a long time, and I always had my eye on him. You kept thinking I was just looking for tips - which I didn't argue with, mind you," she giggled to Jess again. "Well, I snooped and found out he worked at Truncheon," she turned to Rory. "So I submitted some of my poetry to one of their showcases, and here I am!"

"Her stuff was terrible. That's what got my attention," Jess smiled at her.

She hit him in the arm, "oh, stop teasing. It just needed sprucing up!"

"I let you in anyway, remember? I still haven't lived it down, but you had your moment."

"You guys seem really happy," Rory smiled, looking at Jess. He caught her eye, turning away from Allie, and looked down.

"So you're from... Where's that dreary little town you lived in once?" Allie turned to Jess.

"Stars Hollow?" Rory offered.

"Right," she nodded. "Glad to get out of there for a bit, I'd imagine. What brings you out here?" Rory blinked, not sure if she should go on the defensive or not. Before she could answer, though, Jess piped up.

"Rory's actually in town with the campaign. She's working for an online magazine, following Obama's trail."

"Wow, a political reporter. You should have warned me earlier so I would know to keep my mouth shut," the girl giggled.

"Oh don't worry, nothing's on the record, I promise. We're just having a friendly coffee to catch up. I've been on the road a long time and took the chance for a small break as soon as I found one," Rory said quickly.

"Hey, yeah, Allie, what are you doing in so early? I thought you were working later."

"Oh, I grabbed an extra shift," Allie's smile became a bit stiff. "Dan was out last night marching the town apparently, so I said I'd cover. It worked out didn't it?" Rory noticed the other girl's eyebrows pull together ever-so-subtly. She realized it was probably a good time for her to bow out now before she started a fight with those two.

"Oh, speaking of which," Rory chirped. "Look at the time, will you? I'd better get going. I've got a train to catch!"

"So soon?" Allie pouted, getting up and helping Rory lift her bag.

"Like I said before, it's a really tight schedule. Not time for much these days, but it was nice seeing you." Rory put her laptop back in its case.

Jess stood, shoving his hands in his pockets. He was clearly uncomfortable at the sudden departure.

"We'll see you at the wedding though, right? At the end of June?" Allie continued beaming.

"Um, yeah, one of those dates. I'll be there. It's my mom's wedding too after all."

"Oh right! Of course! So we'll definitely see you!" Allie grinned and stood for a moment. Realizing no one was saying anything, she quickly added, "Well, I'd better get back to work and let you two say a proper goodbye. Nice meeting you, Lori, is it?"

"Close enough. Bye Allie." The girl meandered back to the kitchen, clearly keeping watch out of the corner of her eye. "Well," Rory said.

Jess looked up "Sorry, I didn't know she was going to be here."

"No, it's not a problem. I'm glad I got to meet her. She's just a little protective, but I'd expect nothing less," they both smiled awkwardly. "She seems nice. _Perky_ ," Rory raised a mocking eyebrow, trying to hide her smile.

"Yeah," Jess shrugged, grinning his lopsided grin. "Her poetry was all angsty, so I didn't know what I was getting myself into. She's grown on me though."

"Apparently. You look happy."

"Yeah?" He smiled, looking up.

"I'm glad, Jess. You deserve it."

"Yeah, well," he patted her arm. "You've got a train to catch, right?"

"Right." They stood in front of each other, waiting for the other to say something. "Oh, here's my card," Rory remembered, digging it out of her bag. "My cell's on a world network, so you should be able to reach me at all times, if you want to. But my email's there too if that's easier. Probably cheaper."

"Thanks, I'll keep that in mind."

"Let me know how the sequel's coming so I can tell Oprah," she tried to wink.

He laughed, "I will try. Not promising anything though, I'm still pretty swamped."

"Fine, whatever you say!"

They stood again. "Well, bye, I guess," Rory shrugged.

"Talk to you soon, probably," he shrugged. Awkwardly, they both reached out for a hug, both going the same way first, almost getting themselves tangled. When they finally got it right, he patted her on the back twice, like a chum. She smiled to herself, but held on a moment longer. He let her, and gave her a light squeeze.

Finally they parted, avoiding the other's gaze. "Go," he said. "You've got a train to catch!"

"Right," she said. "It was nice seeing you!" She waved as she quickly left the small cafe, lugging her laptop over her shoulder.

* * *

Something buzzed against her leg. Rory slowly opened her eyes. The scenery was slowly drifting by outside the window as the sun dipped lower in the sky. She pulled her phone out of her pocket and checked the call-display.

"Hello?" She mumbled sleepily.

"So about this sequel idea..."

She smiled to herself.


	7. On Gershwin Time

"Rory, you made it!"

"Of course! I would never miss this for the world!" Rory leaned in and gave Sookie a quick hug. "Sorry I'm a bit late."

"Not at all, we've barely started. You look great!"

Rory turned in a circle, showing off her flapper dress and hair she'd pinned into a bob. "I went all out! You look cute too."

"Thanks sweetie. I just threw this together. You're mom's back there trying to get Michel to crack."

Rory gave her a questioning look. "All the guys have a pin, and they're not allowed to talk to any of the girls all night. If they do, they have to give up their pins. The girl with the most by the end of the night gets a prize. Your mom already has five."

"She is very determined when she wants to be. Poor Michel." They both laughed as Michel threw his pin at Lorelai and started into a loud rant. "Thanks so much for organizing all of this, Sookie. I know I wasn't much use being so far away this whole time."

"Hey, as the honorary maid of honour, it was fun! The party planning is the best part, and it means I don't have to stand up there in front of everyone on the big day. I get all flustered in crowds. I get shaky and start saying things that really shouldn't come out of my mouth..." Sookie looked off to the side, embarrassed, and her eyes fell on the table of goodies next to her. "Oh, here! Your bachelorette package!" She handed Rory a bunch of cards with numbers on them, stickers in the shape of kisses, and one that said _hitched_ on the back. Rory picked it up and examined it.

"What's this?"

"Oh, sorry, I'll take that. My mistake!" Sookie took the card back quickly and popped back up with another deck saying _Loose._ She shuffled through them, giggled, and then handed one to Rory. "Here you go! They're dare cards. You have to do what it says on the front at some point during the night, and give the card away, or your mother decides your fate with some embarrassing stunt!"

Rory flipped hers over. It read _Snog a Sailor._ She sighed. There was no way she'd be following those directions without enough alcohol in her system.

"What sort of embarrassing stunt?"

"I don't really know." Sookie looked worried. "It's supposed to be you sing a song or do a funny dance, but your mom's been going at the Kahlúa a bit hard. Who knows what she'll think up. I'd get rid of the card if I were you."

"Good plan. This is all so great, Sookie. Thanks again!"

"No problem, Luke's over there by the poker table if you want to say hi."

Rory wandered through the town hall which had been fully decorated to match the Great Gatsby themed Bachelor/Bachelorette party planned for Luke and Lorelai. The front had tables set up by the stage where Miss Patty arranged for some light entertainment in form of herself and her back-up dancing boys. The back of the place looked like a casino for the 'Bachelors' to enjoy themselves quietly as the girls went about their shenanigans. It seemed to fit the couple well. The guests appeared in various forms of costume. It was all very bright, glittery and classy. Rory couldn't help but smile at all of it coming together.

"Rory, good. Help me out here, will you?"

"Hey Luke! Uh, whatcha doing?"

Luke had himself plastered with his back against the wall by the snack table looking paranoid.

"It's this stupid thing your mom started. I got up to get April some chips, and I think she tricked me into it."

"She's a smart girl tricking her father into getting snacks. I, uh, don't see the problem."

" _Your_ mother put those stickers in that package for everyone with a very _mean_ purpose."

"I don't follow."

A husky voice chimed in from behind Rory. "It's basically pin the tail on the donkey, but the kissy stickers are the pins and Luke's ass is the target." Rory and Jess laughed as Luke looked more uncomfortable and hid his behind more firmly against the wall.

"Will you be quiet? Don't go spreading the word here."

"Has anyone been successful yet?" Rory asked.

"No!" Luke growled, "But Babette's been watching me like a hawk all night. She tried to swoop in when I got up for snacks. I saw her pass April something earlier, I should have known it was a set-up."

"Ungrateful daughters and their betrayals. The world is so unjust."

"Tell me about it. Hey, you're almost my daughter. Give me a hand. You can make up for the bad seed over there," he nodded towards April. "I've been standing here forever. I need to sit. Give me cover or something."

"Yes sir."

Rory and Jess walked on either side of a very paranoid Luke who kept looking over his shoulder. Babette caught Rory's eye and gave her a big wink. Rory stealthily pulled out a sticker and took aim. Luke jumped into his chair at the last second, dodging the attempt.

"Geez, not you too, Rory! That is just so wrong!" Luke glared.

"Hey! Hands off my man!" Lorelai giggled, stumbling over to them. "I just love saying that. I don't think I'll ever get tired of it. Hey sweetie," she said, giving her daughter a hug. "Mommy's a bit drunk. But I'm the bachelorette, so I'm told it's allowed."

Luke growled up to her, "Did you really have to put the kissy stickers in? Don't you have enough games? I can't sit here all night avoiding people, you know."

"See, I was really banking on that. I hear Babette and Miss Patty have a bet going to see which one can get the most stickers. I think I even overheard Kirk cutting in on the action. Quite a feat too, since he's still got his no-talking pin."

"This is just ridiculous, you know that?"

"But sweetheart," Lorelai batted her eyelashes. "You keep telling people to 'kiss' your 'ass', so I thought you'd enjoy them taking action for once!"

"She does have a point there," Jess chimed in.

" _You_ are not helping," Luke glared at Jess. "And _you_ -" he pointed to Lorelai.

"You love me and think I'm adorable and want to marry me despite my devilishly charming qualities?" She grinned widely, completely unashamed and sat on his lap.

"Well, yeah." Luke mumbled, hiding his smile. "Something like that I guess. Don't think this is over though!"

"Never," Lorelai leaned in and gave him a kiss.

"And, I think that's our cue," Jess said, taking Rory's arm and steering her away from the happy couple.

"Good call. I'll give her a proper hello later, I think." They wandered over to the bar to order drinks from a determinedly quiet Kirk.

"So, you managed to get away for a night?" Jess asked.

"Yeah. It was hard to convince my boss to give it to me with the election so close, but he came around in the end. Gave my assistant a night alone for once. We'll see how she does for note-taking."

"Sounds like you trained her pretty well in the last few months. She should be up to it."

"It's still nerve-wracking giving something you've worked so hard on to someone else. Even if only for a night."

"Yeah, I think I understand that." Jess smiled at her, "You look very festive."

"Thank you. I grabbed this from a costume shop in New York the last time I was there. It's a bit silly, but exactly perfect for the occasion."

"Frills look good on you," he winked. "I was going to go with a fedora, myself, but I figured there would be enough of them around."

"Aw, you should steal one! You'd look so dashing."

He looked up and held her gaze for a minute, mouth locked in a crooked smile, "Well I might have to now."

"So, where's Allie?" Rory asked, suddenly feeling a little uncomfortable. "I didn't see her when I came in."

"Oh," Jess looked down. "No, she couldn't make it."

"Oh, that's sad. I was looking forward to seeing her again. Was she busy working?"

"Uh, yeah, I guess." Jess shoved his hands in his pockets.

"Hey kiddo! I missed you!" Lorelai jumped over and gave her daughter a big hug. "Now give me a proper hello." She made Rory spin on the spot, examining her. "Is it really you? You're still all in one piece? No terrorists stole your wallet on the trail?" Lorelai grabbed her daughter's arm, touching her on the face to check the reality of her.

"It's me, all in tact! No wallets stolen by any terrorists." Rory shrugged out of her mother's clutching grasp and pushed her arms down. "I missed you too, mom! You look fabulous!"

"Yeah, well," Lorelai showed herself off half-heartedly, spinning in her red sequinned dress. "I'm the bride, so you're supposed to tell me that. Now tell me everything! When did you get in? How are the polls? Did you have to kill anyone?"

Jess smiled as the two women began to bubble in each others' presence "I'm gonna let you two catch up." He wandered over to the casino side to play a game with April.

* * *

The music sped up to a lively swing number, and though it was late and only half the guests remained, they were all having a fantastic time. People danced and chatted merrily, drinking sodas and cocktails and munching on chocolate cigars. Rory danced with Lane and Zach at the front to one of Miss Patty's scat-filled jazz numbers.

"May I have this dance?" Jess said, sneaking up behind Rory.

She gasped, smiling. "Are you drunk?" She asked suspiciously.

"Why would I be drunk?"

"You're asking me to dance. You don't dance."

"I've been known to dance once in a while," he laughed as she glared more suspiciously at him. "And yes, I am a little drunk." He pulled his hand out from behind his back, flipping a fedora onto his head, grinning.

Rory laughed, "I knew it! And yay, you found one!"

"I may have spotted it lying all alone by Taylor's table. Looked like it needed a home," he grinned as he grabbed her hand and tried to copy what she was doing. "Okay, I really am drunk. I have no idea how to do this stuff."

"It's the Charleston. Here, like this," Rory laughed, swinging her legs back and forth.

"No. No way am I doing that," Jess stated, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Hey, you're the one who asked, now get to it."

"It was on my freaking dare card. How about you just take it and say it happened. People will believe you."

"Ah, maybe, but there are rules for these things! And I am a stickler for rules. Shake those hips, Mariano!"

Jess rolled his eyes and took a few steps, looking around to see if people were watching. "It couldn't have been a slow dance? Those I can do. Just stand there and sway a little. A monkey could do it."

"You're such a romantic, you know that?"

Of course, just then, the quick song ended and slowed down. Miss Patty announced her big number and took the mic for the classic Gershwin ballad _, Someone to Watch Over Me._

The music started soft and steady.

Rory and Jess smiled awkwardly at each other, "Well, look at that. It's like you planned it that way." Rory smiled.

"Yeah, looks like it," he shrugged. "Uh, shall we? I still owe you that card, don't I?"

"Um, sure, why not?" Rory smiled.

Miss Patty sang, deep and melodic, reaching everyone with her strong voice.

_There's a saying old, says that love is blind._  
Still we're often told, seek and ye shall find.  
So I'm gonna seek a certain lad I've had in mind. 

Jess pulled her close, holding her hand. They looked into each others' eyes first, smiling softly, but Rory suddenly felt too exposed. She moved closer and looked over his shoulder.

_Lookin' everywhere, haven't found him yet._  
He's that big affair I cannot forget.  
Only man I'll every think of with regret. 

The scent of him overwhelmed her. Suddenly she was seventeen again. She closed her eyes, trying to remember how happy she had been with him at times. Their first kiss. Their first 'date', if you could call it that.

_I'd like to add his initials to my monogram.  
Tell me where is the shepherd for this lost lamb?_

How had it gone wrong? They were always meeting each other at just the wrong time in their lives. Sort of like Luke and her mom. But they'd made it work somehow.

_There's a somebody I'm longing to see,_  
I hope that he turns out to be,  
Someone to watch over me. 

She opened her eyes, realizing that their cheeks were touching. She pulled her head back to look at him. He smiled, his eyes dark. Her breath caught in her throat.

_I'm a little lamb who's lost in the woods,_  
I know I could always be good,  
To one who'll watch over me. 

"So, uh, I guess this means you earn giving your card away," she whispered.

He grinned crookedly. "I think it was worth it."

"Yeah," she looked down. "I think so too."

_And though he may not be the man some_  
girls thing of as handsome,  
To my heart, he carries the key. 

Her heart was beating very quickly. She was sure he could feel it. "I guess it's only fair if I give you mine too."

_Won't you tell him please to put on some speed,  
Follow my lead, oh how I need_

She closed her eyes and moved her head inches closer. Their lips met as the song came to a triumphant close.

_Someone to watch over me!  
Someone to watch over me. _

They parted, breathing deeply. Miss Patty made an announcement over the microphone, "Congratulations to Luke and Lorelai for _finally_ figuring it out!"

The whole room broke out into applause. Rory and Jess stayed locked where they were for a moment before turning and joining in clapping to the happy couple.

Luke and Lorelai gave each other a quick kiss, and then bowed to their audience. Babette took the opportunity to run up with her sticker, getting Luke square on target while he was bent over. He cursed and tried to turn after her, but Lorelai held onto him. She gave him another deeper kiss to distract him, trying not to laugh as she did.

Rory and Jess laughed with the crowd and then turned to each other, smiling. The spell broken, Rory pulled the card out of her bag and handed it to Jess with a wink. "Here you are, sailor."

Jess looked at it and smiled. "A deal's a deal I guess." He handed her his dare card as the music jumped up to a quick tempo again. "Now please, let's get off the dance floor so I never have to re-live the Charleston again."

"Deal!" They both grabbed a drink from Kirk and found a table at the side of the room. They settled in, watching the room bop and sway to the cheerful music. Rory felt giddy.

"Hey, did you get a chance to look at that last chapter I sent you?" Jess asked, taking a sip.

"I did, actually!" Rory said. "And I have lots of notes! I mean, it was great, but you have a habit of using too-short sentences," she pointed accusingly at him, laughing. "I brought it on my computer since I didn't get a chance to email you back yet."

"Show me," Jess insisted.

"Right now?"

"Sure, why not? We did our time, and the party's slowly dying down. Show me."

Rory met the mischievous twinkle in his eye, and felt a twinge of adventure through her drunken haze.

"I'll need a power cord," she said, taking another sip.

"I've got one at Luke's apartment." He grinned, leaning closer.

She pretended to consider. "Well I am only in town for a little while, so..." She smiled and held out her glass to him. "You've got yourself a deal, sir! I'll grab my laptop. Meet me out front!"

* * *

The cheerful bleeping tune cut through Rory's head like a knife. She opened one eye angrily and reached for her phone to stop the awful noise.

"Hello?" She answered groggily. The voice on the other end sounded angry and spoke far too quickly. "Hold on, slow down," she murmured. "What did Lauren do with the notes?" Rory sighed, resigned to her fate. "Okay, okay. I'll get started and I'll be there as soon as the quickest flight lands." Sometimes she hated having such a demanding job. "Mmhmm. Bye." She turned off the phone, pushing it under her pillow and closing her eyes again.

The person next to her shifted in the bed, and Rory's eyes shot open again. She turned carefully. It was Jess.

 _Jess, of course it was Jess!_ She thought as her memory slowly came back to her. She tried to slink out from under the covers carefully and grab her dress that had been tossed by the side of the bed.

"Who was on the phone?" Jess mumbled behind her. She froze and silently swore to herself.

"Um, my editor. I have to finish a story and head back as soon as possible," she whispered as she searched the dark for her undergarments.

Jess groaned and grabbed her around the waist, pulling her back down, "No. Too early. Stay. Sleep."

Rory tried not to laugh, but struggled out of his grip. "I can't," she said, pulling her things on. "I have to go." She turned on the light, trying to find the rest of her stuff. Her head throbbed at the sudden brightness.

Jess moaned his own pain from the bed. Rory looked around at the mess they'd left. Her computer was tossed to the side, barely looked at. Clothes were everywhere. Suddenly, she stopped and sat on the edge of a chair and burst into tears.

Jess sat up, more awake now. "Rory?"

"No, sorry," she sniffed, trying to make herself stop. "I'm leaving."

"You don't have to-"

"I'm sorry, Jess. This was a big mistake. I can't believe I did something like this _again_. I'm so stupid. I thought I'd- Well, whatever. I have to go."

"What? No, don't go. Why are you-?"

"Allie?" Rory said.

Jess stopped and looked down. "Oh. Rory, it's not what you-"

"Yeah, I know. It never is." She pulled her bag over her shoulder, crossing her arms over her chest. "I have to go."

"Rory, wait!" Jess called after her, but she was already out the door.

He sunk down and held his head in his hands.


	8. Headaches and Espresso Beans

"No, sweetie, it's fine." Lorelai sighed, forcing a smile on her face. "I completely understand. You'll get here. No rush."

Lorelai hung up the phone and buried her head in her arms. It was dark in the diner. She was fairly certain she was alone, since everyone was already at the inn for the night, ready for an early start in the morning. For the wedding. Finally succumbing to the urge, she let out a sob.

Jess walked down the stairs to exit the diner and froze, seeing Lorelai bent over the counter shaking. He looked around, and seeing no way to escape unnoticed, he cleared his throat. Lorelai bolted up and immediately wiped her face. She made a noble attempt to make it appear nothing out of the ordinary was wrong.

"I, uh. Sorry. I was just grabbing some stuff from upstairs," Jess muttered.

"Yeah, no problem." Lorelai cleared her throat and smiled weakly. "Not staying at the inn?"

"I'm headed over there now. I had some things to grab."

Lorelai nodded, noting the bag he was holding. "I was just-"

"Hey, don't sweat it. None of my business," Jess shuffled awkwardly. "Well, I'll see you."

"Right. Bright an early!" Lorelai smiled brighter. They both knew she was doing a terrible job looking happy.

Jess nodded shortly and walked towards the door. He opened it, but then stopped and turned back towards the wilting woman behind him.

"Is it Luke?" he asked. "Or just cold feet?"

Lorelai turned to face him, praying she didn't need to have this conversation with him. "Neither. Everything's fine. Go to the inn, I'll see you there in a bit."

"'Cause if he did something, I could, you know, get TJ to kick his ass for you."

"No-"

"He's been looking for an excuse, it's no trouble."

"Jess." Lorelai levelled her gaze at the young man. " _Luke_ is perfect. I'm fine, really."

"So it's the cold feet then," Jess glared back. "You know, I've never had the chance to say this, since I've been at a distance the whole time, but Luke is a great guy,"

"I know he is-"

"I honestly don't know if I'd pick you for him after your history, but he's obviously got his own opinions, so it's none of my business."

"My _history_?"

Jess' face got dark. "If you screw this up with him again-" he spat.

"Jess, stop it," Lorelai barked. "This has _nothing_ to do with Luke."

"What is it then? You're getting married tomorrow. You don't look too rosy about the whole idea."

Lorelai sighed and turned. She bit her lip, trying to stem the new wave of tears that the sudden anger brought on. "It's Rory, ok?" She mumbled.

"Who?"

"Rory! She's going to be late. They won't let her off work tonight, so she's catching a red-eye and will be there tomorrow morning. But not tonight."

"Oh." Jess looked away, suddenly quiet.

"It's stupid, I know, I was just- I was _hoping_ she'd be here the night before, you know? Sort of a last night type of thing. We'd had it all planned out with cocktails and old movies and we were going to tell each other long bad stories to ease the nerves. I just- I'm _so_ proud of her job and _all_ that she's done." Lorelai buried her head in her hands. "It just _really_ _sucks_ sometimes. Especially now. I need my best friend." She sighed, then peeked up with one eye.

Jess was standing frozen. Not sure what to say. Afraid to move. "I could, uh, find Sookie for you?" he offered.

"No, she's with the kids at the Inn," Lorelai waved off, embarrassed. "I'm really sorry about this. I'm just stressed out and missing my kid. I shouldn't keep you here. You don't need to hear any of this from me. Go on."

Jess took a deep breath, then put the bag he was holding on the counter next to Lorelai. It clanked on the hard surface. "I think you'll probably need this more," he said, reaching for two glasses.

"What's this?" Lorelai asked, reaching for the bag. Inside was a big bottle of Scotch.

"I may not be Rory, but I've got booze, and you can tell me any story you want. I promise I'll think they're all bad," he said pouring out the glasses.

"Why?" Lorelai asked, looking wary.

"Why not? I've got nothing else to do. You seem to need the company."

"But you were just ready to jump down my throat a second ago."

Jess raised a glass to her. "Drink up," he said, taking a sip.

Three glasses and a lot of babbling later, Lorelai smacked the table loudly. "Oh my god! I've figured it out!" she laughed.

"Figured what out?" Jess sat with his arms crossed, amused. He was on his second glass watching the older woman slowly relax.

"This!" She grabbed the bottle, which he quickly took away from her before she spilled it. She pouted, but then smiled, remembering what she was going to say. "You wanted to see Rory tonight too, didn't you?" Lorelai pointed at him, smiling drunkenly. "That's why you were getting the scotch and running back to the Inn all hurried-like." Lorelai patted her nose. "You can't fool me."

"Naw, I didn't think she'd be there yet..." Jess said, shrugging and looking away.

"Aha, but you wanted to!"

"How do you know it wasn't for Luke? Maybe he's freaking out as much as you."

Lorelai stopped and looked concerned for a minute, but then seemed to decide something and shook her head. "Nope, not buying it. I'm a mother, so you can't fool me. Besides, Luke's getting a pep talk from TJ." They both shuddered.

"And you wonder why I stayed away from them?" Jess countered.

"Quit stalling! The booze was for Rory, wasn't it?"

"Well, maybe..." He sighed. What was the harm opening up on this? He'd already heard way too much about what was going on in Lorelai's head that he wasn't sure if he could take much more. He also knew she wouldn't drop it until he said something. "We didn't exactly leave on the best note."

"Yeah. She's pissed at you." Lorelai nodded into her cup.

"And I have no idea why! She didn't wait to hear me out!" Jess said, sitting up.

"She's not a fan of cheaters, that one. She's got a bad record."

"I heard a bit about that. But _I_ didn't cheat. I would never do that to her."

Lorelai contemplated him carefully, swaying in her seat. "Gotta say, Jess, I never liked you."

"Really? And you hid it so well," he scoffed, crossing his arms.

"Hear me out," she held out a hand. " _Now_ I'm not so sure. You're turning out to be not half bad."

"Golly, you gonna give me a gold star too and pat my head?"

"I'm serious. You did good with what you had. That doesn't happen for everyone."

"Are you trying to give me some sort of approval?" Jess asked, taken aback.

"I didn't say that," Lorelai smiled. "You're just not half bad. Anymore. You used to suck. Like, _really_ suck." She looked off into the distance, remembering. Then she turned to Jess, "Rory's pretty lucky to have you sniffing around lately though. If _you_ screw this up again-" Lorelai hiccoughed and then tipped her glass, finishing off the contents. "Just don't give up on her, ok?" she leaned her head against the table. "And if you ever quote me on any of this, I'll deny it all."

"Naturally," Jess smiled as Lorelai's eyes began to droop. "Same to you, Gilmore." Loud snoring started up from the bride-to-be sleeping drunkenly on the counter. Jess gave Luke a call to come get her.

* * *

Rory rushed through the main entrance of the Dragonfly, carrying all her bags under her arm and balancing a giant paper coffee cup.

"Where is she?" she said loudly to a perturbed Michel.

"Upstairs, of course."

"Room? I need a room number! Now!"

"Please calm down. Let me check the system for you," Michel smiled to himself.

"You don't need to check the system! I have no time for this," she yelled and turned to the stairs, calling out, "Mom! I'm here! Where are you? Marco?"

Just then a small figure ran down the stairs in her path, nearly knocking her over.

"No, sugar, let the nice lady finish making you beautiful before we get the candy. Oh, sorry Rory," Liz gave a very tired smile as she tried to move out of the way and grab the bouncing bundle.

A scream issued from what turned out to be a young girl covered in tangles and curlers.

"No, Doula." Liz bobbed down to grab her, but she just got louder. Closing her eyes, Liz took a breath. "Screaming won't change anything. I'm ignoring you now!" The screaming was steady and ear-piercing. Liz looked up at Rory and tried a smile. "You look great!" she shouted. "Your mom's up the stairs on the left getting ready!"

"Thanks!" Rory shouted back, turning up the steps. "Good luck!" The screaming died away a little before Liz realized Doula had made a break for the front door. She bolted after her young daughter.

"Mom?" Rory said, peeking into the door.

"Shut! Shut the door!" Lorelai whined, wincing. She reached her arms out for Rory, and the two hugged tightly.

"I made it! Sorry for being late again!"

"Oh, but you're here now! That's all that matters! And you've got perfect timing too. She's coming back. Quick, be a distraction!"

"Who's coming back?"

"Rory, is that you?" Lorelai jumped and pushed Rory into the path of her mother.

"Hi Grandma!"

"Well, look at you, all grown up!" Emily pulled Rory into a hug and held her at arm's length to get a look at her. "You look just radiant. The road's been good to you it seems."

"Yeah, it's stressful, but fantastic. I'm so sorry I'm late. I tried to get out last night, but there was some last minute article-"

"Not another word, I completely understand. I'll just have to have a talk with that new president of ours and see if his first order of business can't be to give my granddaughter some time off."

Rory smiled, "I'm sure he's got it on the top of his priorities, right behind fixing the country up."

"I have no doubt," Emily smiled brightly, then caught a glimpse of Lorelai and turned. "You're not wearing your hair down like that, are you? I specifically told Tiffany that your hair should be up, this isn't just some bar night you know, Lorelai, this is your _wedding_. Tiffany?" she called out.

"I know mom, it's fine. I like my hair like this," Lorelai sighed.

"And I can see bags under your eyes. Why are there bags under your eyes? Don't tell me you stayed up late. I specifically told you to go to bed _early_ and wear that goats milk mask I got sent out for you from Venezuela. You look old. Where's Alexandria? If anyone can fix this mess it's her. I pay her enough. It's such a disaster. You know, if you'd only listen to me once in a while things would go much smoother. I do know what's best _sometimes_ , Lorelai. _Tiffany_? _Alexandria_? Where are those girls?" Emily dashed out of the room, nose in the air and ready to find her next prey.

"Quick, give me some aspirin before she comes back!" Lorelai begged.

"Aspirin? Here you go. Why?"

"Splitting head ache. Long story. Lots of scotch."

"Scotch? Oh no! You had our cocktail night still, didn't you?"

"Sort of," Lorelai said, swigging down the tiny pain-killers.

"I'm _so_ sorry for missing that. I tried so hard to get out of work, but the trying took too long and by the time I got out of there I'd already missed my flight, and-"

"Hey, kid, don't sweat it," Lorelai put a hand on her daughter's head to stop her. "It would have been great to have you there, but we'll get another chance," she smiled. "You've still got your big day coming sometime out there in the future. And now I know to stay away from scotch when it arrives." Lorelai winced. "Besides, I got looked after."

"You're lucky to have Luke," Rory nodded. "Can I get you anything? Coffee? Tranquilizer for grandma?"

"Oh, so tempting. Yes to both. Cleatus may have some tranq's in the stable. That should keep her at least a little sedated for a few minutes." Rory gave her mother a look, which was met with a devilish grin. "A vat of coffee for me should do the trick."

Sookie ran through the door, out of breath, just as Rory turned to leave. "Oh, hi Sweetie!" She gave her a quick hug, then yammered on to Lorelai. "Okay, the band arrived and is setting up out back. The cake's all ready and waiting, I just put the finishing touches on it. And I think the flowers just got here, but I saw your mother run into the delivery man, so I don't know what happened after that."

"Ack, she's probably sending them back! Do you think she'll notice that we changed the order?"

"Emily? She seems pretty perceptive," Sookie's face dropped in worry.

"Nah, leave them," Lorelai said. "Who really needs flowers at a wedding anyways?"

Rory snuck out quietly to find the coffee. She paused on the stairs, nearly running into someone again. This time it was Jess.

"Hey," he said quietly. "I was just coming to find you."

"Sorry, I'm busy," she glared and pushed past him.

"Rory, wait. I have something for you," he said, pulling an envelope from his back pocket.

"Sorry, the bride has spoken and needs her coffee. Take a rain check," she said over her shoulder, turning the corner away from him.

He tried following her, but a young girl whizzed by. He caught her and picked her up. "Where are you going?" His little sister smiled up at him, her face covered in melted chocolate. Liz ran up behind him, doubled over and out of breath.

"She found the chocolate fountain," Liz breathed. "You," she pointed at her son, "were a breeze compared to this one. Help me get her into the hair and make-up room before she figures out how to get on the horses."

* * *

"I thought the way the sun was setting right behind Lorelai was just amazing. Very symbolic. And then the snow started! It was like the universe approving of their union. They're entering the winter of their years together, finally ready to cozy up and wait out the long haul side by side, two souls bound together for eternity. Didn't you think it was just so _spiritual?_ "

Emily blinked at Liz, entirely at a loss for words.

"Hey, now don't you mind the old woman," TJ laughed pointing to his wife. "She gets her head caught up in all this voodoo spirituality crap. It's all a bunch of hoo-haw if you ask me, nothing someone as classy as yourselves would find interesting at all, I'm sure."

Liz smacked TJ. "Don't call it hoo-haw, you know very well that this stuff is what holds everything together. You, me, Luke, Lorelai, even the two of you." She smiled at Richard and Emily. "I'm sure you've felt the spirits of the world guide you two together in all your years with each other, aren't I right?"

Richard looked at Emily, equally as dumbfounded. "I- suppose once or twice-" he stuttered a response.

"Grandma, Grandpa! How did you like the meal?" Rory jumped in, ready to save them.

"Rory! There you are," Emily breathed. "I thought it was just excellent. Sookie was the caterer, right? We simply must go tell her how divine the duck was."

"Oh! _Duck_! See, Liz, I told you there was something off about that chicken, didn't I?" TJ piped up before Richard and Emily could leave.

"Yes, yes he did."

"Too rubbery or, what was it?"

"It was all dark," Liz laughed, "We thought maybe it was starting to go a bit _bad_."

"Right, but I thought, hey, this chicken tastes _awesome_ even if it is on its way out, so what the hell, right? Waste not! And it turns out it was _duck_ the whole time! It just goes to show you."

"It just goes to show you!" Liz beamed. Emily and Richard looked at Rory in horror for some clue as to how they could politely respond. Rory shrugged helplessly.

"Uh, mom, Doula needs you," Jess quickly patted his mother on the shoulder.

"What do you mean Doula needs me? April's got her." Liz turned back to Richard and Emily. "That kid's a godsend, I tell you. Doula won't listen to _anyone_ else." Emily rolled her eyes at Richard when Liz turned as if to say 'we know.'

"Yeah, but they were playing hide and seek. Now April can't find Doula."

"Oh geez, she could be anywhere. Excuse us, Richard, Emily, nice meeting you." Liz smiled politely and then turned madly. "TJ, check the stables!"

Emily clutched her heart when they left. "My god, who _were_ those people?"

"That was Liz and TJ, Grandma. You've met them before, haven't you?" Rory asked.

"I should like to think I'd remember meeting _them_. Who do they belong to? Why are they here?"

"That's my mother and her husband," Jess said, barely hiding a grimace.

"Oh, of course. And you're Luke's nephew, right?" Emily looked down her nose.

"The one and only," Jess returned Emily's glare with a snarky smile.

"Right. I remember you now," they sized each other up for a moment. "Richard, let's go find Sookie. We have to compliment the fantastic meal." Emily turned on her heel, leaving her husband to follow close behind and Rory and Jess to glance away from each other awkwardly.

"You didn't have to do that, you know," Rory crossed her arms over her chest.

"Do what?"

"Step in like that. I had it covered."

"I don't know what you're talking about. My sister's missing."

"She is not, I saw April playing with her two minutes ago."

"Kids are fast," Jess shrugged.

"Sure they are. Regular road-runner that one. Now excuse me, I have guests to entertain."

"I liked your speech," Jess said, following her as she walked.

"Thanks."

"I thought getting an A-team reference in there took lots of skill. You must have worked hard on that one."

"Yep, pulled an all-nighter," Rory turned away.

"So, what, we're not even talking anymore, is that it?"

"Pretty much."

"Did you even look at the manuscript I left you?"

"Manuscript?" Rory asked.

"Never mind. There's your mom. I'll leave you alone," Jess turned and walked off into the crowd.

"Hey kiddo!" Lorelai bounced over. "Was that Jess you were talking to?"

"No," Rory said defiantly. "I was _not_ talking to him."

"Right. Still mad?"

"Not mad, not anything. Now let's change the subject," Rory shook her head and then smiled at her mother. "I was just saving the Universe from imploding. Liz and TJ found Grandma and Grandpa."

"No! And I missed it? How purple did mom get?" Lorelai smiled giddily.

"There were many shades of many different colours all around," Rory laughed.

"What happened?" Luke came up behind them, handing a glass of wine to Lorelai.

"Your sister found my parents," Lorelai giggled.

"And we missed it?"

"I know! Okay, here's the plan. You round them up and we'll lock them all in a room with one-way glass, and we can charge people to watch the mayhem ensue! We could make millions!"

"I honestly don't know who I'd be rooting for in that one," Luke sighed.

"You guys are mean," Rory said.

"Ah, that's what makes us work so well together, right Mr. Gilmore?"

"Geez, will you stop calling me that? I'm not changing my name," Luke rolled his eyes.

"It's only fair. If you want me to change mine, you change yours."

"How about we just keep our original names and call it even?"

"Patriarchist."

"Crazy-woman! Rory, what did I get myself into?"

"You knew very well, sir, and I thank you for taking her off my hands."

"Hey guys, you haven't seen a little girl running around like the Tasmanian Devil, have you?" April popped her head in, wringing her hands.

"No, sorry. You lose Doula?"

April nodded. "In hindsight, hide and seek was probably not the best game to play in a crowded inn. Should have pulled out the Jenga."

"Toppling towers and a three year old? Really?" Lorelai asked.

"Good point. Either way, I have to find her again. Any ideas?"

They heard a crashing door and a wild giggle across the room.

"I think you may have a lead," Luke sighed.

"Rory why don't you go keep an eye on her while April gets their jackets. Doula might want to play in the snow for a while," Lorelai offered.

"Good idea," April said. "I'll be right back!"

Rory ran to the balcony door to catch the monster child before she got too far. She followed the giggling, thanking the fact that it was still close. To her surprise Doula wasn't the only one out there. Jess had her on his lap, and she was passing him something secretly, laughing proudly.

"What are you doing? What are those?" She tried to look closer at the small bags Doula had taken out of the pockets of her skirt. "Those are the party favours! The chocolate espresso beans are supposed to be on the tables for the guests to take home after! How did she get them?"

"Relax, I just told her to get the ones from the tables where everyone left. She hasn't had... many? Right Doula?" The little girl grinned and laughed maniacally, teeth clearly covered in chocolate.

"Your mother is going to kill you, you know that right?"

"Doula? I found your snow-suit!" April ran out holding a jacket and some mitts. "Oh, hi," she said to her older cousin. She leaned down to the little girl, "Doula, do you want to make a snowman with me?"

"Snowman!" Doula screamed in excitement.

"Okay, but you have to give _all_ those bags to Jess now, okay? And right after that we're going to read a story and go to bed. Do you understand?"

"SNOWMAN!" Doula said and dug more bags out of her pockets and threw them at Jess. She grabbed for her coat and April raced after her.

"That sneak, she told me she'd given me all of them. Poor April's gonna have a rough night."

"Like brother like sister I guess," Rory crossed her arms over her chest.

"What does _that_ mean?" Jess stood.

"Oh nothing," Rory said. "I guess it just runs in the family, not knowing what's actually yours or not. The whole staying with what you've got thing is hard to follow."

"Are we still talking about Doula here? Because it sure sounds like you're accusing her of something," he said angrily.

"No, I'm not accusing _Doula_ of anything. She's fine. She's a kid. She doesn't know any better."

"Oh, and I do?"

"You should by now! We're not teenagers anymore, you can't just use people!" Rory nearly shouted at him.

"What, like you tried to use me before?" he scoffed.

"That was different. I never actually went through with anything," Rory defended herself.

"Yeah, that took a while to establish if I remember."

"Hey, don't go blaming me for-"

"And don't get angry at _me_ when you don't know what you're talking about! You were there too, or did you forget?" Jess spat. "If I'm so guilty and terrible for what happened last time, then what are _you_ in all this? Look in a goddamn mirror for once, before you call in the brigade on me, Rory."

"That's not fair!" Rory felt angry tears start to well up in her eyes, and focused on keeping them down. "I didn't mean to put Allie in that position. I was drunk, and-"

"Stop it. You obviously didn't read what I left in your room, so don't waste my time," Jess pushed past her towards the door.

"What did you leave in my room?" Rory asked, confused.

Jess paused. "Just for the record," he spat over his shoulder. "We broke up _months_ ago. But thanks for checking that first before all this." He stormed off, leaving Rory frozen on the balcony.

* * *

She wiped her eyes in her room a short time later. The manila envelope was hiding under her dress bag. She must have thrown it over top without realizing it when she was rushing to get ready.

Rory took a breath and opened the envelope. She pulled out a bunch of pages with a cover that said "Epilogue." The last chapter of Jess' book.

She put it down and sighed, reaching for the Kleenex. She didn't know what she'd been expecting. A letter with all the answers? A long confession of his undying love? She put the paper on her bed and went to the bathroom to splash some water on her face.

But he'd made it sound so important, like he _did_ have something significant to say in there. She picked up the papers again and turned the page. She gasped after reading the first little bit, and grabbed a pencil.


	9. The Epilogue

Rory ran outside, breathing hard. It was snowing again, big billowy puffs. It was late. There were still a few stragglers at the reception. Kirk and Lulu were dancing sleepily when she'd passed through to check.

She finally found him at the bridge, feet dangling over the water. She stopped when she saw him, almost nervous. He looked up. After a moment of recognition, he stood. She ran towards him.

"I take it you read it," he said, tossing a pebble into the water.

"I did," she smiled up at him. He wouldn't meet her eye though. She pulled the envelope out of her coat and looked down at it. "Interesting ending. I don't know if Matthew will sign off on it," she smiled. "But I loved what's there."

She handed the envelope to him. He took it without a word.

* * *

_Miles knew it was her. She looked different, even with the blindfold on, but it was her. He paced around the room for a moment. Everyone was waiting outside, so they were alone. She looked scared._

" _First, I have to clear something up." He said._

_She moved her head, searching for the direction his voice was coming from._

" _I left. It was a long time ago. I don't regret it. They were slowly killing me. They wouldn't let me move. But it changed everything. So I also regret it more than anything."_

_He could see the recognition dawn on her face._

" _You saw me leave," he kept going. "I couldn't say anything. I tried so hard. I tried telling you why I couldn't survive there. But you were too caught up in the deception to hear me."_

_He paced more. She wasn't saying anything. It made him nervous._

" _I came back. I came back because it was just as hard surviving without you. I thought I could do it, but I was wrong. But this time you couldn't see me. Life was impossible after that, but I survived. I hoped I'd get another chance."_

_She pursed her lips._

" _Say something," he pleaded. "Do you remember any of this?"_

_Laurie squared her shoulders, managing to look defiant even while strapped to a chair like a prisoner. "Take off my blindfold," she whispered._

* * *

"Jess?" Rory said. He turned away from her. "What is it? I understand now, and I forgive you. Why won't you look at me?" her smile was fading.

"Because that's not enough," he said, trying hard to not look at her.

"What do you mean it's not enough?" she was confused. Her giddy fuzzy feeling was starting to wear off.

"What about me? How do you know I've forgiven _you_ yet?" Jess spat, arms crossed over his chest.

Rory opened her mouth to respond angrily, but stopped. "Oh," she looked down. She hadn't even thought of this, though she supposed it made perfect sense. "I didn't even-"

"Ya, well that's pretty obvious."

* * *

_He walked carefully over to her and slowly untied the fabric around her eyes._

" _I thought so." She said darkly, finally able to see his face. "And it's just you? Where are the others?"_

" _What others?"_

" _You rarely come alone. Leave alone, sure, but it's never just you. Don't you have some rival sitting in the corner I should wait for you to deal with first?"_

" _Why don't you tell me? They were always your rivals I dealt with in the first place," he said, remembering all the others he'd had to fight with for her._

" _I never needed to be protected!" She yelled._

" _That's obvious. Must be why you're the one in the chair right now," he laughed cruelly._

" _Tell me why I'm here," she demanded._

_He glared at her, not sure what to say._

* * *

"I was just so caught up in everything." Rory sighed. "I've been busy for so long, I didn't even consider," she pulled a hand through her hair self-consciously. "Well that was stupid of me," she laughed bitterly. "I'm so sorry Jess."

"For?"

"For..." she considered. "Well, for yelling at you like an idiot earlier, for starters." She sat down at the side of the bridge. "That was completely uncalled for. I should have asked first but I didn't. The whole cheating area is a bit of a sore point. I've had experience on both sides of that coin, and it's not pretty either way. I just really didn't want to be involved with it ever again, and I jumped to a conclusion. I'm sorry about that."

"I kind of get it," Jess said, sitting next to her.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Rory asked him. "About Allie, I mean. We were emailing each other back and forth, even talking on the phone for months. You never mentioned it."

"I dunno," Jess shrugged. "I didn't really want your opinion. Or your pity. It was nice just talking to you again. I didn't want to rock the boat in case things got weird." He put his hands in his pockets.

"And that's it?"

* * *

" _You do realize she's gone, right?" Miles said carefully._

_Laurie stopped. She hadn't realized. She didn't hear him before._

" _What do you mean, gone?" she asked._

" _She left. Months ago. When she realized I was still looking for you, she disappeared. She said it wasn't worth her effort to get pulled back into danger."_

_She looked down, "You've been looking for me all this time?"_

_He nodded. "It was hard, but I never could stop."_

" _But I deceived you before... why?"_

_He shrugged. "That wasn't really you. I hoped it would be worth it in the end."_

" _Do you still think it was worth it?" she asked, blushing._

_He walked towards her chair slowly._

* * *

"I guess I was still kind of pissed at you for before," Jess admitted.

"What before?" Rory asked, then realized. "The open house? That was years ago."

"Call me crazy, but you have to admit that was a pretty messed up night."

Rory sighed, "I guess it was. I should apologize for that one too."

Jess looked at her sideways.

"Oh, you're gonna make me spell all of these out, is that it? Well fine," she sighed. "I was stupid then too, and selfish and confused." She folded her hands in her lap, remembering. "I really didn't know what I was thinking back then. I had a boyfriend that I really did care for and cared about me, but was pulling lots of crap. I was angry. Your invite came at a good time and I wanted to get back at him, but... I couldn't. Not with you. Maybe if it had been someone else... I don't know. I've never felt like a bigger idiot about anything, if that makes you feel better."

"A little bit, actually." Jess smiled to himself, still not looking at her. "I just don't understand why you went back to him."

Rory looked down. "He wasn't all bad. He could be a _really_ great boyfriend when he tried. And a little after that night he got in an accident. It sort of gave me some perspective." Rory bit her lip, remembering. "You know, he even proposed after graduation."

"I heard about that one," Jess muttered bitterly. "You turned him down."

"I did," she nodded. "I wasn't ready. And when it came down to it, he wasn't right for me. Not forever. We had different goals; we came from very different places. It was just... not the right time. Who knows what I'd have said if he'd asked later, though," she shrugged. She pulled her jacket tighter, realizing that almost a year and a half later, she still wasn't ready to say yes to Logan if he'd asked now. She could never have been a Huntzburger wife.

She glanced over at Jess, who looked pained.

"I'm sorry, this is turning into a sucky apology," Rory murmured.

Jess shrugged.

* * *

" _You've changed," he whispered into her ear. "You're darker."_

_She didn't say anything._

" _If I let you go, I can't be sure you won't turn me back in, or try to kill me," he said._

_She looked up at him hard. They locked eyes._

* * *

"You have to understand," Rory said into her hands. "When you yelled at me about dropping out of Yale, I was _very_ out of it. I didn't know who I was any more. I thought I wasn't good enough to do _anything_ I'd been planning my whole life to do. I made some really... odd choices. And it took me a really long time to get out of that. Maybe I still am. It's hard to tell," she shrugged. "But you started to bring me back. No one else could get through to me, and believe me, they tried." Rory laughed bitterly. "I'm just- I'm a very different person now I think."

Jess sighed. "You're not so different," he met her eye.

"You've changed a lot though," she said, and he nodded his agreement. "You can't be the only one."

"I guess you do have more of an edge to you than when you were the censorship mascot," Jess winked.

She smacked him on the arm lightly, but laughed. "A good edge?"

"A new edge." He grinned lopsidedly. "It's not unwelcome, it's just... different."

Rory nodded, smiling to herself. "And you've got a more settled feeling to you."

"Do I?" he asked.

She nodded, "Yeah. Who do you remind me of? Oh I know..."

"What?" He lowered his eyes playfully.

"A little old man!"

"Geez," he rolled his eyes. "At least you didn't say a puppy dog or something."

"Of course not," Rory laughed. "You're still far too surly to be a puppy." Jess shook his head at her, and she grinned, glad that the tension was slowly lifting.

* * *

" _But," he said, carefully untying her hands, "I see enough of the old you in there. We could just as easily find somewhere in the middle to land together. I know I want to."_

_She stood up when the last tie was loose. She squared off at him angrily, hands clutched in fists. She was glad to be free, finally. He knew the feeling. He froze, afraid of what she might do. But then she stopped, relaxed, and a smile flicked across her face._

" _Ready to find out?" She asked._

_... end ..._

* * *

"So," Rory motioned to the envelope. "Those characters of yours have a pretty interesting story, don't they?"

"Yeah, I guess so," Jess said.

"I always thought that Laurie character should get another chance. Even if she did become a bit of a bitch in the middle."

Jess laughed, "Oh you did? Interesting."

"You left it on a bit of a cliff-hanger, though. Are you planning on writing more, or is it one of those open ended conclusions?"

Jess leaned back on his elbows and looked out over the lake. "I don't know yet. It depends."

Rory nodded. She looked over the lake too, watching the fluffy snow melt silently into the water. She let out a deep breath and watched the air puff out like a cloud of smoke. She closed her eyes. "Jess?"

"Mmhmm?" He mumbled.

"I love you."

The wind blew softly. The snowflakes collected in their hair. Everything was still and silent, like nothing had changed. He slowly turned toward her. His heart had skipped a beat. He wasn't sure if he'd heard her right.

"I'm sorry?"

"I love you," she smiled. "I love your smile. I love your snarky remarks. I love that you wrote a book! I love that you keep looking for me when not even I can find me. I love that you support me through everything, even if it hurts you and you have to wait for me. You're my best friend, Jess, and no matter where we are or what we do, I love you."

He could only stare at her, his mouth slightly open.

His silence started to make her uncomfortable. "I, uh, just thought you should know." She shuffled a little, turning red. "I'm sorry. I know it doesn't change anything, and it's been a long time and you probably hate me now, especially since I-"

He lifted his hand to her cheek. "Will you stop talking?" She stopped and looked up at him, eyes large and vulnerable. "You have no idea how long I've wanted to hear that," he grinned and leaned in. "I love you too."

Their lips touched. It was like fireworks going off. They pulled each other closer and relaxed in the other's arms. Finally alone, together, at the right time and the right place. They pulled apart and smiled at each other.

"So now what?" Rory asked, feeling a little dizzy.

He put his arm around her and pulled her into his shoulder. "Now," he said, lifting the envelope with his free hand. He tossed it into the lake.

Rory sat up quickly. "Hey!"

"What? Matthew wouldn't have signed off on it anyways!" He chuckled.

"I wrote notes in the margin for you!" Rory protested.

"So tell me what you said," Jess whispered into her ear.

"Well I can't remember now. It was all very-" he started nibbling on her ear, "specific... grammatical... will you stop that?"

He smiled, "Why?"

"You have a chapter to save! Go get it!"

"It's too cold. I'll write you another one."

"But-" she pouted "I wanted to find out what happened."

"Well," Jess sighed, then stood. He pulled her up next to him so they were both standing on the bridge together. "I guess," he grabbed her around the waist, "we'll just have to find out together, won't we?"

He kissed her.

"That's a nice line," she said, coming up for air. She pointed to the water, "but I still want-" He cut her off with another kiss.

"But I-" she squirmed.

"Sh!"

And finally, happily, she gave in.

* * *

The End.


End file.
